How to not be a Tool
by Yawh
Summary: Percy had enough of bending to other people, be it Gods or Gabe. The Sea didn't like being restrained, and neither did Percy. It was time to make a change for the better and to be his own person. Different!Badass!Swearing!Cool!Percy R&R
1. Medusa

Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson

Warnings: **Language is going to be strong.** If you have a problem with it I suggest not reading it. I'll rate this fic at T for now, but with a possibly of it rising higher than that in the future.

Summary: Percy had enough of bending to other people, be it Gods or Gabe. The Sea didn't like being restrained, and neither did Percy. It was time for make a change for the better and be his own person. Different!Badass!Swearing!Cool!Percy

Author Note: **This change seems extremely abrupt. I would like to say that it will not stay this extreme, not for long.** Half of this more extreme reaction was because of the threat on his life, mixed with bad memories. It will calm down in the next chapter of two, however not all the way. Please let me know your thoughts of this. Not sure on the pairing yet, you can give me ideas on that too. Love and hugs! **Review!**

Chapter One: Medusa

Medusa, one mother fucking bitch. I couldn't help but feel somewhat... Infuriated by the situation that I found myself in now.

I'd accepted a quest from the gods, looking for their misplaced items for _god's_ sake, and now I almost gotten killed by some monster who, from what I remembered, Annabeth's mother thought was a great idea to make.

Finally I said, "So we have Athena to thank for this monster?"

Annabeth flashed me an irritated look. "Your dad, actually. Don't you remember? Medusa was Poseidon's girlfriend. They decided to meet in my mother's temple. That's why Athena turned her into a monster. Medusa and her two sisters who had helped her get into the temple, they became the three gorgons. That's why Medusa wanted to slice me up, but she wanted to preserve you as a nice statue. She's still sweet on your dad. You probably reminded her of him."

Really? For someone who was meant to be smart, this girl was dumb as fuck. I didn't really know what was coming over me at this moment but I couldn't help but point it out, "It's my dad's fault that your mother made a monster that almost killed her own daughter? Your mother, made a being that goes after you and your other siblings, likely killing quite a few." His tone turned quite sarcastic, "Yes, that's my father's fault, not your mother's jealousy problems. Maybe next time _I should take someone to fuck all the way up toward her little temple see how she likes that._"

I almost wanted to punch her, I was sick and tired of everyone treating me like an idiot, or making me be nice to people I didn't want to be anywhere near amicable to.

Gabe...

The bastard that abused me, and yet my mother made me stay near him, made me be nice to him. I was sick of it now, so sick. It was time for an attitude change, one that was far overdue.

Annabeth straightened, seemingly wanting to get back at me for the words toward her beloved mother. In a bad imitation of my voice, she said: "'It's just a photo, Annabeth. What's the harm?'"

It was almost amusing that the little girl thought she was making a cutting remark. So what if I thought that Medusa wasn't a danger at first, Annabeth certainly didn't seem too against the idea at first. Nothing close to it, in fact the only one that didn't really want to come in was Grover. Yet she was trying to blame the fact that we almost got killed by the monster on me, because I didn't know right away that something was wrong, "News flash brain bitch, you didn't know either, not at first."

She seemed so mad that she turned red, unable to form words.

"Hey!" Grover interrupted. "You two are giving me a migraine, and satyrs don't even get migraines. What are we going to do with the head?"

Grover seemed somewhat put out by my remarks, was he really that surprised? I'd been in how many different schools; did he think that I did nothing to get kicked out of them? That I didn't have some sort of attitude when people managed to piss me off? Didn't I say I was going to kill that Nancy character because she was throwing some food at Grover? Man that half barnyard animal was dense if he hadn't realized my temper.

My eyes got directed toward something, blame it on the ADHD, but I ended up staring at it. One little snake was hanging out of a hole in the plastic. The words printed on the side of the bag said: WE APPRECIATE YOUR BUSINESS!

What had Medusa said?

_Do not be a pawn of the Olympians, my dear. You would be better off as a statue._

I got up. "I'll be back."

"Percy," Annabeth called after me. "What are you-?"

I searched the back of the warehouse until I found Medusa's office. Her account book showed her six most recent sales, all shipments to the Underworld to decorate Hades and Persephone's garden.

Cute, and not at all morbid as fuck.

According to one freight bill, the Underworld's billing address was DOA Recording Studios, West Hollywood, California. I folded up the bill and stuffed it in my pocket, making a note that I should get some new clothing soon. Something with fewer… Happy colours. If I was going to change, I wasn't going to be doing it in halves.

In the cash register I found twenty dollars, a few golden drachmas, and some packing slips for Hermes Overnight Express, each with a little leather bag attached for coins. I rummaged around the rest of the office until I found the right-size box and some paper.

I went back to the picnic table, packed up Medusa's head, and filled out a delivery slip, not even realizing that I was doing so in Greek, although thankful for it. Made for no embarrassing spelling mistakes because of dyslexia:

_The Gods_

_Mount Olympus_

_600th Floor,_

_Empire State Building_

_New York, NY_

_With best wishes, this bitch turned me off woman for years. Bad taste Dad, bad taste._

_PERCY JACKSON_

Next I took out some paper and got to writing letters, three letters to be more exact. One to my father, one to Athena, and one to my dear uncle. Why? Because I wanted to piss at least two of them off extremely. I was actually going to be wondering forever what their reaction to this was. Maybe if Dad found the humour in it all he would tell me.

_Dear Uncle,_

_Once I find your little toy don't leave it around for people to steal. I mean honestly, who leaves their godly symbol somewhere someone else can get it. If I ever thought you were anything close to mildly intelligent, I don't anymore._

_Love and hugs,_

_Percy Jackson_

_Your favourite Nephew_

The next one was to Athena; it would be much more strongly worded. The woman reminded me far too much of Gabe and the whole issue that I had with that bastard.

Plus maybe she would learn her lesson, you know, like not making things that almost killed your own kids, out of something as immature as someone having sex in a building. Perhaps I was hyper-relating too much and would regret this later…

…

Nah, whatever I said would be true, just harshly worded. With that in mind I got to writing the letter.

_Dear Older Brain Bitch,_

_I find it amusing that you turned that Medusa woman into something that goes around now and attempts to kill your own children. I honestly do. I hope that you enjoy the son of your enemy cleaning up your mess. I also hope that someday I can bring one of my own love interests over to your temple and fuck them against that sacred ground, just to spite you. What will you do? Endanger your own children again? Congrats, for one of the supposed smartest people around, you are quick to anger and prone to revenge without thinking about the consequences._

_You remind me of my Step-Father, an abusive son of a bitch that didn't give a shit about me or my mother. Just like he didn't care about my mother and me, you don't care about your own children even though they are your responsibility._

_I can't express enough how much you are my least favourite goddess for your **idiocy**._

_As far as Medusa I'm going to consider her attempt to kill me as if it came from you. In the future should you ever need me, and I've no doubt you are scoffing at the very thought right now, but if you ever do, I'm not going to be at your service. Don't bother asking, because the only favour I'm doing you is maybe helping your daughter along on this quest so that she doesn't die. Because as much as I hate you, I wouldn't be such an evil fuck that I take it out on someone else._

_Peace out Bitch_

_Percy Jackson_

I honestly had no clue what was going on with me right now, but I certainly didn't mind it. Seemed like a good enough change, I simply wasn't going to allow others to push me around.

That's not a bad thing, right?

Sea doesn't like to be restrained, no, it CAN'T be restrained.

_Dear Dad,_

_Really though, you have bad taste in woman. You might have actually turned me gay. Think Apollo or Hermes would be into it?_

_Just kidding... Kind of. I mean from what I've heard Apollo is amazingly hot, and not just being the Sun God way._

_Your soon to be favourite Son,_

_Percy_

That was far more familiar then the other letters. Although I didn't really know my father, I feel a connection to him. I knew that he looked after me the best that he could. He must have visited me as a child as well, otherwise I wouldn't know what he looked like.

The other Gods didn't really visit their children, I'd learned that much. It meant that my father bent the rules to protect me in some way, and I respected that.

A thought struck me, why didn't the kids attempt to send mail through Hermes to their godly parent? Was that against the rules?

Oh well, who cared. I didn't care; after all I just basically told them all to fuck off. Breaking a few rules was nothing compared to telling Gods were to shove it. Besides, for all they knew these letters found be signed confessions, so they would have no choice but to read them.

"They're not going to like that," Grover warned. "They'll think you're impertinent."

Placing the letters into the box as well, I poured some golden drachmas in the pouch. As soon as I closed it, there was a sound like a cash register. The package floated off the table and disappeared with a pop!

"I am impertinent," I said.

I looked at Annabeth, daring her to criticize; the girl just might get punt kicked with my current mood.

She didn't. She seemed resigned to the fact that I had a major talent for ticking off the gods, something that I couldn't help but worry might come back to bite me in the ass. "Come on," she muttered. "We need a new plan."

Maybe Brain Bitch, but you aren't going to be the one coming up with all of it. I won't allow you to put aside my input anymore, Daughter of a Fool.

End of Chapter One:

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**Review and love up the story**, give me suggestions and such I promise I will listen. **Love and hugs!**.


	2. We get Advice from a Poodle

Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson

Warnings: **Language is going to be strong.** If you have a problem with it I suggest not reading it. I'll rate this fic at T for now, but with a possibly of it rising higher than that in the future.

Summary: Percy had enough of bending to other people, be it Gods or Gabe. The Sea didn't like being restrained, and neither did Percy. It was time for make a change for the better and be his own person. Different!Badass!Swearing!Cool!Percy

Author Note: A long time in coming right? Because it was such a long time I decided to dive right into the story, and forgo the god reaction. However, either tomorrow or later tonight I will be posting the reaction as an interlude chapter. **Hope that you like it, and please PLEASE review. **

Chapter Two: We get Advice from a Poodle

After all that bullshit with Medusa, we'd taken some food and blankets from Aunty Em's, but we didn't dare light a fire to dry our damp clothes. The Furies, Medusa, and my own attitude change had provided enough excitement for one day.

We didn't want to attract anything else.

We decided to sleep in shifts. I volunteered to take first watch, if only because I wanted to plan a few more things out before I went to bed, like where I would get some new clothing, and more. Having powers and not knowing how to use them wasn't a good idea.

_Great powers come with great responsibility_, I thought to myself sarcastically.

Annabeth curled up on the blankets and was snoring as soon as her head hit the ground, I would always remember this moment, just so I could make fun of brain bitch later.

Grover fluttered with his flying shoes to the lowest bough of a tree, put his back to the trunk, and stared at the night sky.

"Go ahead and sleep," I told him, slightly worried about my only friend's health. "I'll wake you if there's trouble."

He nodded, but still didn't close his eyes. "It makes me sad, Percy."

"What does? The fact that you signed up for this stupid quest, along with a delusional bitch who thinks her mother actually gives a shit about her?"

"No. This makes me sad." He pointed at all the garbage on the ground, ignoring the whole of what I said after _what does?_

"And the sky. You can't even see the stars. They've polluted the sky. This is a terrible time to be a satyr."

"Oh, yeah. I guess you'd be an environmentalist." I managed to keep most of my spite out of my tone, I think.

He glared at me. "Only a human wouldn't be. Your species is clogging up the world so fast ... ah, never mind. It's useless to lecture a human. At the rate things are going, I'll never find Pan."

"Pam? Like the cooking spray? I might also point out that even as humans are clogging up the world, you and your kind haven't exactly made a stand. What are you waiting for; if you have a fucking problem you don't wait for someone else to fix it."

"Pan!" he cried indignantly. "P-A-N. The great god Pan! What do you think I want a searcher's license for? … And you might have a bit of a point… However we want Pan to come back to help with these problems, to tell us what we should do to clean up…"

A strange breeze rustled through the clearing, temporarily overpowering the stink of trash and muck. It brought the smell of berries and wildflowers and clean rain water, things that might've once been in these woods.

Suddenly I was nostalgic for something I'd never known, even if only the slightest bit.

"Tell me about the search," I said, surprising myself somewhat. I didn't even really care, it seemed like a fruitless thing to me. If this Pan didn't want to be found, why should they bother.

Grover looked at me cautiously, as if he were afraid I was just making fun.

"The God of Wild Places disappeared two thousand years ago," he told me. "A sailor off the coast of Ephesos heard a mysterious voice crying out from the shore, 'Tell them that the great god Pan has died!' When humans heard the news, they believed it. They've been pillaging Pan's kingdom ever since. But for the satyrs, Pan was our lord and master. He protected us and the wild places of the earth. We refuse to believe that he died. In every generation, the bravest satyrs pledge their lives to finding Pan. They search the earth, exploring all the wildest places, hoping to find where he is hidden, and wake him from his sleep."

"And you want to be a searcher."

"It's my life's dream," he said. "My father was a searcher. And my Uncle Ferdinand ... the statue you saw back there."

"Oh, right, that sucks."

Grover shook his head. "Uncle Ferdinand knew the risks. So did my dad. But I'll succeed. I'll be the first searcher to return alive."

"Hang on, the first so all the ones that left didn't come back, not even once?"

If Pan was around, it seemed unlikely that he gave a single shit about his people if he just allows them to die on a quest to find him like that.

Grover took his reed pipes out of his pocket, looking mildly saddened. "No searcher has ever come back. Once they set out, they disappear. They're never seen alive again."

"Not once in two thousand years?" I was starting to be really annoyed with the stupidity some people in this new world I had come into shown.

"No."

"And your dad? You have no idea what happened to him?"

"None."

"But you still want to go," I said, amazed. "I mean, you really think you'll be the one to find Pan?" I tacked on the last bit hastily, not really wanting to insult my friend, yet at the same time wanting nothing more than to beat some sense into him. Obviously this was a fool errand.

"I have to believe that, Percy. Every searcher does. It's the only thing that keeps us from despair when we look at what humans have done to the world. I have to believe Pan can still be awakened."

I stared at the orange haze of the sky and tried to understand how Grover could pursue a dream that seemed so hopeless. Then again, was I any better, when despite the fact that my mother was dead, I was chasing after her, hoping she was alive, and that she actually cared for me.

"How are we going to get into the Underworld?" I asked him abruptly. "Plus, even if Hades has the bolt, how would we even get it from him. We have absolutely nothing that he wants, nothing of value compared to something like that bolt anyway. Essentially the only option left would be to steal it back, and I'm not sure I want to steal from the fucking god of the underworld. I mean, other than my dad he's totally one of the most bad ass. You hear me Hades? "

_Yeah_, I thought to myself, _I'm sucking up, but anyone would in my fucking hopeless situation._

"I don't know," he admitted. "But back at Medusa's, when you were searching her office? Annabeth was telling me-"

"Oh, I forgot. Annabeth will have a plan all figured out." I tried very hard to be the most sarcastic person in the world at that moment.

"Don't be so hard on her, Percy. She's had a tough life, but she's a good person. After all, she forgave me..." His voice faltered.

"What do you mean?" I asked, curious enough that I didn't comment on the fact that I sincerely doubted she had it anywhere near as hard as I did. "Forgave you for what?"

Suddenly, Grover seemed very interested in playing notes on his pipes.

"Wait a minute," I said, somewhat musing to myself, but otherwise just watching my friend's reactions to my words "Your first keeper job was five years ago. Annabeth has been at camp five years. She wasn't ... I mean, your first assignment that went wrong-"

"I can't talk about it," Grover said, and his quivering lower lip suggested he'd start crying if I pressed him. "But as I was saying, back at Medusa's, Annabeth and I agreed there's something strange going on with this quest. Something isn't what it seems."

"Well, duh. I'm getting blamed for stealing a thunder bolt I obviously couldn't have taken, considering I don't even fucking know where the fuck Olympus is for starters."

The unamused look on my face most likely spoke for itself here.

"That's not what I mean," Grover said. "The Fur the Kindly Ones were sort of holding back. Like Mrs. Dodd's at Yancy Academy ... why did she wait so long to try to kill you? Then on the bus, they just weren't as aggressive as they could've been."

"They seemed plenty aggressive to me. If you think that they weren't then you clearly need your eyes checked my friend."

Grover shook his head. "They were screeching at us: 'Where is it? Where?'"

"… You know what, that's actually a somewhat good point. They could be looking for the bolt. Maybe Hades doesn't have it, but decided now would be a good time to get it from who he thought was actually the thief. Can't say I'm glad that I'm supposed to be the thief in this situation, but I think I prefer this to Hades actually having the bolt." I said, it was an interesting possibility.

"Hades is really the only one that makes sense though, unless you think your father took the bolt after all"

"None of this makes sense."

I hated that, why couldn't things just be clear. If I had to do this bullshit mission and be the god's toy then I deserved some kind of fucking boon.

"I know. But if we've misunderstood something about this quest, and we only have nine days to find the master bolt..." He looked at me like he was hoping for answers, but I didn't have any.

I thought about what Medusa had said: I was being used by the gods. What lay ahead of me was worse than petrifaction.

"I haven't been straight with you," I told Grover, trusting that his friend would keep it to himself. "I don't care about the master bolt. I agreed to go to the Underworld so I could bring back my mother."

Grover blew a soft note on his pipes. "I know that, Percy. But are you sure that's the only reason?"

"No, I'm also doing this to help my father. I know that he cares about me at least a little bit, and that's enough to get some semblance of my loyalty. I know that he didn't actually take the bolt, I just feel it. The gods going to war is also bad for all of us, so if I can stop it, then I will, even if I have to be the god's dildo to do it."

Grover gazed down from his tree branch after grimacing at the dildo comment. "I wonder about this change in your attitude man. I've seen some glimpses of this, but this is really different then when I met you."

Now we were getting into the real stuff.

"For the most part, it's just because I'm tired of being played with and told what to do. Being treated like an idiot that can't think for myself, it's annoying as fuck. I'm sick of it, and my attitude adjustment might not get people to change their views, but right now it's making me feel a hell of a lot better about myself."

Grover pulled his feet up onto the branch. "Okay, Percy. I'm your friend… Even though I don't think that this is going to work out well in the end, I'll support you. But please, try to be a little bit nicer to Annabeth."

I nodded, even though I didn't want to. I was after all sick of being nice to people that I don't want to be, however Grover was my only friend, and he was one of the few people that I could count on. I could try to tone it down a little bit around brain bitch… _A little bit_ anyway.

How about I take first watch, huh? You get some sleep."

I wanted to protest, as there was no doubt that Grover was tired as well, but he started to play Mozart, soft and sweet, and I turned away, my eyes stinging. After a few bars of Piano Concerto no. 12, I was asleep, my last thought before darkness was, _and fuck Grover doesn't play fair._

In my dreams, I stood in a dark cavern before a gaping pit.

Looking down made me dizzy.

The pit yawned so wide and was so completely black; I knew it must be bottomless. Yet I had a feeling that something was trying to rise from the abyss, something huge and evil.

_The little hero_, an amused voice echoed far down in the darkness. _Too weak, too young, but perhaps you will do, after all, you don't seem all that happy with them_. The voice felt ancient cold and heavy. It wrapped around me like sheets of lead, I wanted to escape, and I wanted to be nowhere near this being.

_They have misled you, boy_, it said. _Barter with me. I will give you what you want._

A shimmering image hovered over the void: my mother, frozen at the moment she'd dissolved in a shower of gold. Her face was distorted with pain, as if the Minotaur were still squeezing her neck. Her eyes looked directly at me, pleading: _Go!_

Yet for that small second, thinking back on it, I couldn't help but thing: _Go! To the gods that allowed me to die! To the father who allowed you abused!_

I was ashamed of myself for that moment. I knew that my father couldn't come to me for help, I knew that and yet I still thought such a thing. I wanted to blame the being; I hoped it was the being…

Cold laughter echoed from the chasm.

An invisible force pulled me forward. It would drag me into the pit unless I stood firm, I didn't want to go there, and I didn't!

_Help me rise, boy_. The voice became hungrier. _Bring me the bolt. Strike a blow against the treacherous gods!_

The spirits of the dead whispered around me trying to get me to understand, _No! Don't give! Wake!_

The image of my mother began to fade. The being in the pit tightened its unseen grip around me.

I realized it wasn't interested in pulling me in. It was using me to pull itself out; if that wasn't the fucking worst feeling in the world I don't know what is.

_Good_, it murmured. _Good_.

_Wake_! The dead whispered. _Wake!_

Someone was shaking me. Bringing me to thoughts that I just couldn't allow myself to be controlled like this, used like this. I wanted _NOTHING_ to do with the being.

My eyes snapped opened, and it was daylight.

"Well," Annabeth said, "the zombie lives."

I was trembling from the dream. I could still feel the grip of the chasm monster around my chest. "How long was I asleep?"

"Long enough for me to cook breakfast." Annabeth tossed me a bag of nacho-flavored corn chips from Aunty Em's snack bar.

"And Grover went exploring. Look, he found a friend."

My eyes had trouble focusing; all I wanted to do was forget that feeling in my chest of being so completely used.

_The sea doesn't like being used._

Grover was sitting cross-legged on a blanket with something fuzzy in his lap, a dirty, unnaturally pink stuffed animal.

No. It wasn't a stuffed animal. It was a pink poodle.

The poodle yapped at me suspiciously. Grover said, "No, he's not."

I blinked. "Are you ... talking to that thing?"

The poodle growled.

That was it, I had gone fucking insane. That dream had affected me more than I thought because Grover is talking to a fucking pink poodle. I refuse to believe my eyes.

"This thing," Grover warned, "is our ticket west. Be nice to him."

"You can talk to animals?" I said somewhat dumbly, I had just awoken after all.

Grover ignored the question. "Percy, meet Gladiola. Gladiola, Percy."

I stared at Annabeth, figuring she'd crack up at this practical joke they were playing on me, but she looked deadly serious. Brain bitch was deadly serious about this fucking pink ass poodle...

"I'm not saying hello to your new bitch," I said. "Forget it; I wouldn't do that for any animal, never mind a fucking pink poodle. I've finally fell of the rocker."

"Percy," Annabeth said. "I said hello to the poodle. You say hello to the poodle."

The poodle growled.

I just growled back, there was No. Fucking. Way. "No, and I don't get where you seem to get the idea its okay for you to tell me what to do in that condescending tone of yours."

Condescending, _adjective,_ having or showing a feeling of patronizing superiority.

Her tone always reeked of it, practically dripping from her lips with every word she said. I wondered if that was something she got from her mother for a moment, but I've never met that particular god, even though I had a feeling I was right in the assumption.

Either way, Grover explained that he'd come across Gladiola in the woods and they'd struck up a conversation.

The poodle had run away from a rich local family, who'd posted a $200 reward for his return. Gladiola didn't really want to go back to his family, but he was willing to if it meant helping Grover.

"How does your new side bitch know about the reward?" I asked

"He read the signs," Grover said. "Duh."

"Of course," I said. "Silly me."

My king of the sarcasm title showing its true colours again.

"So we turn in Gladiola," Annabeth explained in her best strategy voice, "we get money, and we buy tickets to Los Angeles. Simple."

I thought about my dream the whispering voices of the dead, the thing in the chasm, and my mother's face, shimmering as it dissolved into gold. All that might be waiting for me in the West, I almost wanted to run away, but I knew that I couldn't.

Still, I couldn't believe we were taking the word of a fucking pink poodle.

"If I do this, none of us are speaking again about this, ever. Especially you brain bitch."

"No," Annabeth agreed, although she turned red with anger and glared at me for the nickname.

She pointed downhill, toward train tracks I hadn't been able to see last night in the dark. "There's an Amtrak station half a mile that way. According to Gladiola, the west bound train leaves at noon."

Chapter End:

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Author Note: PLEASEPLEASEPLEASE REVIEW!


	3. Interlude: Gods React to Letters

Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson

Warnings: **Language is going to be strong.** If you have a problem with it I suggest not reading it. I'll rate this fic at T for now, but with a possibly of it rising higher than that in the future.

Summary: Percy had enough of bending to other people, be it Gods or Gabe. The Sea didn't like being restrained, and neither did Percy. It was time to make a change for the better and to be his own person. Different!Badass!Swearing!Cool!Percy

Author Note: This is the reaction that I promised! I kind of love how it turned out, especially because I get to add some difference to the deeper plot because of it. The next chapter should be out soon as well.

Also I got a lot of people saying that they really liked the last chapter, which makes me happy. Thanks for the reviews, and maybe you can leave one for this chapter as well.

I should mention, some people are wondering if Percy is going to be gay or not. I have not decided if it's joking or not, however! This will NOT be a part of his life in anyway or really be in the story until at least the second book. He is too young in this book for such thoughts. Sure, he speaks about it and understands it, but that's just because he has heard it, not because he feels it. So **tell me what you think the pairing should be in a review** and I'll think about it!~

Interlude: God's React

Mount Olympus wasn't in a peaceful place at the moment. Everyone was thinking about how they would be going to war, or at least the minor gods were. Most of them were speaking in whispers about whose side that they would be on should the fighting happen.

Curiously enough, a good number of them choice Poseidon. That of course was beside the point.

Inside of the main meeting room however, there was nothing being whispered about at all. It was almost business as usual in fact.

There was always Zeus and Poseidon fighting. This time it was about the fact that the Sky God was accusing Sea God's and his son of something that they didn't commit, but there were other times when it went more along the lines of, "Mother Rhea liked me more."

They weren't the only two fighting of course. Apollo had once again called Artemis his little sister, which he honestly believed to be true, but of course that didn't go along well with her. The Moon Goddess looked just about ready to attack her Sun counterpart.

Other than that, there wasn't much argumentation going on, they were just doing their normal thing.

Aphrodite was looking at herself in the mirror, touching up her makeup by hand, as though she couldn't just snap her fingers and have it done she. Hephaestus was playing with some metal, seemingly intent on making some sort of new invention. Ares was watching the humans, looking in for wars and battles which he could inflame with his power.

Hera and Athena were very much the same in the way that they were watching over them all in mild disgust. They were all like little children, why couldn't they just behave.

There were two gods which were missing at the moment, it wasn't a full meeting after all, just some touch up. This meant that Dionysus wasn't needed be in attendance, so he was stuck at camp half-blood. Also Hermes was out, doing his delivery work.

This changed a moment later when Hermes came in, it was hard to see what he was feeling at the moment, but it seemed to be excitement. He was bouncing on the heels of his winged converse.

"Guys guess what I got! A package from one Percy Jackson to all of us."

There was a smirk on his lips as his announcement t gained the attention of all the gods. In Hermes hands was a box, three notes attached, each was addressed to an individual.

In a brief and amazing show of self control that no one thought Zeus actually capable of, he seemed calm enough to not grab the package right out of his sons hand and rip through the letters.

"I should hope that it is a confession and the return of my bolt, perhaps then I will kill the demigod swiftly." Zeus muttered to himself, "Hermes, open the box then read each of the letters aloud."

Poseidon was somewhat worried. What would his son be sending to Olympus at a time like this? With letters as well, hopefully enough he didn't send anything which would cause the Sky God to take out his frustration on Percy, bolt or no bolt.

Hermes had nodded, opting to read the tag out loud first, his eyes widening with every word that he read.

_The Gods_

_Mount Olympus_

_600th Floor,_

_Empire State Building_

_New York, NY_

_With best wishes, this bitch turned me off woman for years. Bad taste Dad, bad taste._

_PERCY JACKSON_

No one really understood what was meant by that, until Hermes opened the box slightly, saw what was inside, and erupted into laughter. For some time, they waited until Hermes stopped laughing, wondering what the hell was going on.

Zeus was already close to exploding, the fact that Jackson wasn't respectful was enough to piss him off, now Hermes couldn't even hold it together enough to explain what was in the box.

Then Hermes simply grabbed something out of the box and held it up, still snickering slightly.

They stared right into the eyes of Medusa.

The severed head of Medusa.

Apollo burst into laughter as well, unable to help himself. Gods, how long had it been since the last time that there was a hero with the pure bronze balls to do something like that toward the gods, answer? Far too long, and Apollo knew in this moment, that he was going to like this Percy kid.

Sea God was hiding the wide smirk the best that he possibly could. That certainly explained the whole, you have bad taste, thing. Perhaps he could tell his son what the woman was like before that Athena bitch got her hands on the woman. Medusa had been beautiful… Now she was a severed head. Still, he couldn't wait to possibly send his son a note. Finally some family bonding and something to bond over. Like ruined sexuality. Poseidon was sure that his son could forgive him for that at some point.

Zeus was just about turning purple at this point. The sheer stupidity of this mortal to insult the gods like this… He would pay dearly, with his life even. It was humiliating.

Sea God snorted at the picture that Zeus made, and the finally calmed Apollo and Hermes were sent right back into laughter at the colour that their father had turned.

The other gods were showing an array of other emotions.

Ares looked almost interested in the young demigod. It seemed like the kid would be interesting, a son of the big three, and he was starting fights everywhere with no fear. It was something that Ares could respect.

Athena and Hera once again shared the same reaction. This demigod was disloyal, obviously a danger, and should die. Hera was lead more by her natural dislike of demigods, were as Athena was lead more by her pride, forever her down fall. No matter the reasoning behind the feelings, they were still there.

Aphrodite couldn't really care less, along with Hephaestus, both just continued to do what they were doing beforehand. Though they did have some stray thoughts that at least the demigod was mildly interesting, they simply cared more about their own children.

(At least until Aphrodite could get away from the endless meetings to mess with the demigods love life that is.)

Artemis seemed about ready to go and hunt down the insolent male, in fact she was the first to actually speak word, "Lord and Father, send me to kill this male, I will not fail to gain retribution for this slight."

Poseidon narrowed his eyes toward Artemis immediately, ready to act against her if need be. They would not simply kill his son without him having anything to say about it.

"The boy is understandably angered. You have blamed him for something that he couldn't possibly have done; he deserves to get you back in some way. Besides, we haven't even gotten around to the letters yet, for all we know they could have some sort of apology, or perhaps some clue on who really took your bolt." Sea God spoke out as calmly as he possibly could with the current threat to his child.

Surprisingly, Apollo backed him up, "Father you get worse from everyday mortals, saying that you aren't even real. Surely the young demigod hasn't gotten you so mad, why are you so effected by something that a moral would say."

Not really hiding it at all, Apollo gave his uncle a thumb up and a wink. That Percy kid was interesting; he'd most likely be on his uncle's side from now on for matters involving him.

Zeus took another few minutes to calm down, taking Apollo's trickery at calming him down to heart. It was a simple mortal, he, a god, shouldn't be so affected.

"Hermes, do read the notes aloud at this point."

Hermes looked at the letter, reading it through once before a smirk graced his face, he attempted to keep in his laughter as he read it. He couldn't help the slight quiver in his tone as he tried to stop himself from bursting out.

_Dear Uncle,_

_Once I find your little toy don't leave it around for people to steal. I mean honestly, who leaves their godly symbol somewhere someone else can get it. If I ever thought you were anything close to mildly intelligent, I don't anymore._

_Love and hugs,_

_Percy Jackson_

_Your favourite Nephew_

Zeus' expression was emotionless, completely free of any emotion. His eyes on the other hand, were a completely different story. Rage that he had never felt before filled him. His entire existence, not one person had spoken to him quite like that. Even his own brothers had most respect then this one little demigod.

"Oh. My. God. I love this kid!" Exclaimed a laughing Apollo.

Hermes, who was also laughing, so hard that he nearly fell onto the floor in his mirth. "Me too bro, I'm right there with you.

Poseidon finally let out a laugh, unable to help it any longer. Oh how amazing his son was, took after his old man.

"Yes dear brother, do try not to leave your bolt someplace another can get it. You would think that you would take better care of something like that." Poseidon snorted in laughter once again. "All the other gods have managed to not get their symbols stolen, yet the king of the gods is the one that fails."

There were actually a number of gods which agreed with this. Ares for one, and a few more who didn't think it was worth the argument with their father. Even Zeus most loyal and favoured daughter Athena thought there might be a bit to what the demigod was saying.

"Who leaves a weapon like that out where anyone can get it, the most powerful weapon, one that causes wars to start just by being stolen. Horrible tactics and forethought." Ares muttered to himself.

Hera was frowning, this demigod didn't know what he was talking about. Neither did any of the people who were agreeing with him. What more protection did an object need then it being owned by Zeus himself.

Zeus didn't like the disagreements that they were having over his own choices. It was near rebellion, or at least it was to his rage driven thoughts.

"Silence! This… Child doesn't know what it speaks. Now read the next letter, and hope that he doesn't anger me more, or a slow death will be off the table, for him, and anyone who shows him support."

Athena suddenly had a thought, this demigod is ripping us apart, and he isn't even here. This child of prophecy, seemingly without much care at all for Olympus, should be destroyed before it can destroy us. However I shouldn't voice such thoughts now, who knows what the other letters could say.

Hermes took the word of his father to read, this time not reading ahead upon seeing the address. He wouldn't be able to keep it together to complete the first bit at this point.

_Dear Older Brain Bitch,_

_I find it amusing that you turned that Medusa woman into something that goes around now and attempts to kill your own children._

_Apollo, Poseidon, Hermes, Ares, Aphrodite, and _Hephaestus all shot glares toward Athena. It wasn't that they hadn't thought of it that way before, but all the monsters that they may or may not have made would never attack their own demigod children at the very least.

Sometimes others children were okay, but never their own. The fact that Athena made a being which would kill her own children was unspeakable.

Athena on the other hand, just gazed at them with her nose stuck up, a typical "I'm better than you," sort of stance.

_ I honestly do. I hope that you enjoy the son of your enemy cleaning up your mess. I also hope that someday I can bring one of my own love interests over to your temple and fuck them against that sacred ground, just to spite you. _

Poseidon snorted, that wasn't how the story actually went to be honest, but the idea of his son doing something like that amused him. That and it sent him into a horrible world where he had to imagine it for a second, and suddenly he felt a want to burn his eyes out.

Sure gods were usually kinky as fuck, especially Greek ones. However that did not mean that he wanted to think about his son having sex.

Just no.

_What will you do? Endanger your own children again? Congrats, for one of the supposed smartest people around, you are quick to anger and prone to revenge without thinking about the consequences._

_You remind me of my Step-Father, an abusive son of a bitch that didn't give a shit about me or my mother. Just like he didn't care about my mother and me, you don't care about your own children even though they are your responsibility._

That made Poseidon soften his gaze, eyes going sad. He had thought that perhaps his son hadn't had the best life, but didn't really want to entertain the possibility. Now guilt consumed him, sure the laws were there, but he could have broken them, he should have broken them.

Apollo and Hermes were wincing slightly in sympathy. They didn't really understand what that could possibly feel like, as they weren't ever in a situation like that, however they didn't want something like that happening to a demigod with so much promise and an actually honest to god sense of humour.

The two with the most interesting reactions however, were Hephaestus and Artemis.

Hephaestus actually growled slightly at the thought. He might not particularly like or know the kid, but the idea of someone who was meant to take care of you harming you for whatever the reason made his blood boil. He looked at his mother with a glare_, _and even glared somewhat toward Sea God, before he noticed the pure guilt and sadness on his expression

Artemis was somewhat sad, although not really surprise that a male could do something like that to a child. She was surprised that she felt something toward Percy in that moment, sympathy wasn't something she usually expressed especially toward a male, however it was hard not to in such a situation.

_I can't express enough how much you are my least favourite goddess for your _**_idiocy_**_._

_As far as Medusa I'm going to consider her attempt to kill me as if it came from you. In the future should you ever need me, and I've no doubt you are scoffing at the very thought right now, but if you ever do, I'm not going to be at your service. Don't bother asking, because the only favour I'm doing you is maybe helping your daughter along on this quest so that she doesn't die. Because as much as I hate you, I wouldn't be such an evil fuck that I take it out on someone else._

_Peace out Bitch_

_Percy Jackson_

Silence reined.

Athena was furious that a demigod would dare say such things to her, even more so that he would call her an idiot. She was the goddess of knowledge, the goddess of it!

"I was in the right with what I did to Medusa. Who cares if she kills a few demigods along the line, the slight against me was heavy. The punishment was just." Her tone spoke of her pride, her arrogance.

Aphrodite spoke up for the first time in this entire meeting, "Excuse you? Do you have any idea how many demigods Medusa has killed? Most of them were my children. Medusa was my blessed, I was her patron, and you do not get to do things like that. You remember Athena, I still haven't forgotten. You will pay for what you did one day."

Again there was silence; they took in the new information. The only one that even knew about the fact that Aphrodite had blessed Medusa was Poseidon, who shook his head sadly.

Medusa didn't deserve such things, and neither did the children that were killed mostly because of Athena's pride.

Medusa's story was a sad one, one that perhaps would be reversed along with her continued fate one day.

Zeus had enough of the unrelated chatter, even though he was furious at the slight toward his favoured daughter, he wanted to get this over with so that he could get his bolt back and kill that Sea God son sometime this year.

_Dear Dad,_

_Really though, you have bad taste in woman. You might have actually turned me gay. Think Apollo or Hermes would be into it?_

_Just kidding... Kind of. I mean from what I've heard Apollo is amazingly hot, and not just being the Sun God way._

_Your soon to be favourite Son,_

_Percy_

Apollo and Hermes were just kind of wide eyed when Hermes finished the letter. It was certainly nice of Percy to think that about them.

_Hell,_ thought Hermes, _Apollo might be into it_

He sent a smirk toward Apollo who just glared back. Sure enough, Apollo had his experiments in the past, but that was thousands of years ago. Hermes was the only one that ever really brought it up; in fact he was the only one that ever really knew for sure the extent of anything Apollo did.

Poseidon was just gapping somewhat, god his sons attitude was funny, but it was equally as disturbing. He gave a shiver and tried to make sure that no thoughts of his son doing anything could flow into his mind. It just was not the kind of information that he needed. Either way, he would be sending a letter to his son soon and perhaps tell him the actual story behind Medusa.

Zeus was glaring; it was hard to decide what to do at this point.

He didn't have his bolt back, and they had just been insulted so completely and utterly, they had never really been so humiliated. That brought into question what would he do about it? He couldn't kill the demigod, as he didn't have his bolt back. He couldn't punish the demigod, as it might make him less likely to give his bolt back. There was legitimately nothing that he could do.

That just made the situation worse.

Thunder boomed across all of Olympus, there was a storm in Africa, lightening touched down and started forest fires in the mid-west.

"You are dismissed. Let me hear no more of this half-blood until he stands before me to give me the bolt, or to face his judgment, and punishment."

With that he stormed out, leaving the other gods to stare after him, and to their own thoughts.

They all wanted to perhaps even talk about what had happened, but they had duties to attend to, however they were meeting again soon enough, it would be the perfect time to gossip like the school girls that they obviously were.

Everyone left until it was just Hephaestus in the room. Hephaestus who had a plan, something that would surely make his mother mad, and would help the boy whom he felt such sympathy toward. It would require some help from Aphrodite perhaps, but it was the perfect item for Percy to help him along…

With that thought he too flashed away, leaving the meeting hall empty, other than the severed head of Medusa whom no one dealt with. Either out of the overwhelming sadness, anger, or simple not caring.

End Chapter:

Author Note: REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW! Let me know what pairing you think it should be! Also new chapter out sometime this weekend I think!

**ALSOALSOALSO! **

**As this is an interlude, I thought that you might like a special sneak peak into the next chapter. Wouldn't want to let you off without a taste~**

"Don't worry," Annabeth told me. "Mortal police could never find us." But she didn't sound so sure.

"Oh yeah, let's just put it out of our minds because it's unlikely. Let me tell you Annie, my ass is fucking perfect for prison, and not in a good way. Let's try to keep our minds on the fact that the law enforcement officers are after us so that my ass doesn't become the new one man glory hole." I glared at her.


	4. I Plunge to my Death

Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson

Warnings: **Language is going to be strong.** If you have a problem with it I suggest not reading it. I'll rate this fic at T for now, but with a possibly of it rising higher than that in the future.

Summary: Percy had enough of bending to other people, be it Gods or Gabe. The Sea didn't like being restrained, and neither did Percy. It was time for make a change for the better and be his own person. Different!Badass!Swearing!Cool!Percy

Author Note: Alright guys~ New chapter already. Although I warn you that I haven't editted it much, I'm half alseep but I realllllyyy wanted to get it out there, so I'm probably tweek it a bit tommorow. Seems like I'm finally on the ball. So, I almost feel like I've been too hard on Annabeth lately, it seems really bashie, but it will not ALWAYS be this bad. It will change at some point I promise! Anyway I please **READ AND REVIEW**~ Also give me mention in the review about what you think the pairing should be.

Chapter Three: I Plunge to my Death

We spent two days on the Amtrak train, heading west through hills, over rivers, past amber waves of grain, it was peaceful, and I didn't like it.

It practically reeked of a trap in that way, plus the peacefulness made me jumpy, ADHD and all.

We weren't attacked once, but I didn't relax. I wasn't an idiot after all, and the last thing I really wanted to do right now as let my guard down only to end up ass fucked by Kindly Ones or some of the various monsters.

I felt that we were traveling around in a display case, being watched from above and maybe from below, that something was waiting for the right opportunity. In fact, they most likely were. It was interesting when you thought about it that way.

If the gods were watching all the time from up on Olympus, that was just kinda… Kinky. Those voyagers.

I tried to keep a low profile because my name and picture were splattered over the front pages of several East Coast newspapers. The _Trenton Register-News _showed a photo taken by a tourist as I got off the bus from that furies attack. I had a wild look in my eyes. My sword was a metallic blur in my hands. It might've been a baseball bat or a lacrosse stick.

I looked fucking badass.

The picture's caption read:

_Twelve-year-old Percy Jackson, wanted for questioning in the Long Island disappearance of his mother two weeks ago, is shown here fleeing from the bus where he accosted several elderly female passengers._

_The bus exploded on an east New Jersey roadside shortly after Jackson fled the scene. Based on eyewitness accounts, police believe the boy may be traveling with two teenage accomplices._

_His stepfather, Gabe Ugliano, has offered a cash reward for information leading to his capture._

I never wanted to kill my son of a bitch step-father more than I did right now.

"Don't worry," Annabeth told me. "Mortal police could never find us." But she didn't sound so sure.

"Oh yeah, let's just put it out of our minds because it's unlikely. Let me tell you Annie, my ass is fucking perfect for prison, and not in a good way. Let's try to keep our minds on the fact that the law enforcement officers are after us so that my ass doesn't become the new one man glory hole." I glared at her.

The rest of the day I spent alternately pacing the length of the train or looking out the windows. If there was danger coming, then at least one of us needed to be on guard.

And if the police were coming, I needed to plan my escape and how to frame Annabeth, just for shits and giggles.

Once, I spotted a family of centaurs galloping across a wheat field, bows at the ready, as they hunted lunch.

The little boy centaur, who was the size of a second-grader on a pony, caught my eye and waved. It was actually kind of cute; the boy looked about the equivalent of a human seven year old. Although I didn't really know what that would be in centaur years.

Another time, toward evening, I saw something huge moving through the woods. I could've sworn it was a lion, except that lions don't live wild in America, and this thing was the size of a Hummer, and suddenly I didn't feel too good about what it could possibly be.

Its fur glinted gold in the evening light.

Then it leaped through the trees and was gone.

It was obviously something which would try to kill me in the future.

Or at least I feared that.

Our reward money for returning Gladiola the poodle had only been enough to purchase tickets as far as Denver. We couldn't get berths in the sleeper car, so we dozed in our seats.

I didn't really sleep well, and I don't think I would for a long time. However during the small naps that I had managed, I somehow got a stiff neck. It was obviously a curse from the gods.

One good thing that came from all this bullshit that I'd been introduced to was now there was someone to blame for all the horrible shit that happened to me.

Grover kept snoring and bleating and waking me up.

Once, he shuffled around and his fake foot fell off. Annabeth and I had to stick it back on before any of the other passengers noticed, although personally I thought it was a bit stupid. The mist or whatever the hell it was would have just hidden the fact that he didn't have human legs.

"So," Annabeth asked me, once we'd gotten Grover's sneaker readjusted. "Who wants your help?"

"What do you mean?"

"When you were asleep just now, you mumbled, 'I won't help you.' Who were you dreaming about?"

I was reluctant to say anything. It was the second time I'd dreamed about the evil voice from the pit. If nothing else, the bitch could blame me. Plus I wasn't exactly warm and fuzzy with Annabeth, and I never would be again, so why should I bother to talk to her.

But it could have something to do with the quest, and anything that got me finished with this faster was okay in my book.

Annabeth was quiet for a long time. "That doesn't sound like Hades. He always appears on a black throne, and he never laughs."

"He offered my mother in trade. Who else could do that? Also worth mentioning, I'm pretty sure he doesn't laugh because he's around dead people all day. Maybe if the rest of the gods talked to him he wouldn't be such a fucking grump all the time. Gods, you people are fucking idiots half the time I swear."

"I guess ... if he meant, 'Help me rise from the Underworld.' If he wants war with the Olympians.—"

I cut her off swiftly, "We need to entertain the idea that Hades doesn't have the bolt or want war. For all we fucking know he could be trying to find the bolt to give it back to Zeus. Why is everyone assuming it's him, what does he gain from war when all it will cause is more dead people, and more work for him."

Maybe Grover sensed my emotions, frustration at Annabeth and the entire situation as I was. He snorted in his sleep, muttered something about vegetables, and turned his head.

Annabeth readjusted his cap so it covered his horns, seemingly assuming that I was trying to defend Hades because I wanted to deal with him, she spoke. "Percy, you can't barter with Hades. You know that, right? He's deceitful, heartless, and greedy. I don't care if his Kindly Ones weren't as aggressive this time—"

"This time?" I asked. "You mean you've run into them before? Also I'd like to point out once again, they were pretty fucking aggressive. You weren't the one that did anything against them after all, you were basically useless, and so you wouldn't know."

Her hand crept up to her necklace. She fingered a glazed white bead painted with the image of a pine tree, one of her clay end-of-summer tokens, and in true show of how quickly she was learning to ignore my jibes, "Let's just say I've got no love for the Lord of the Dead. You can't be tempted to make a deal for your mom… And you wouldn't have lived if it wasn't for the help that I gave you."

Except I would have.

"What would you do if it was your dad?" I gave her a speculative look; surely the girl would be tempted. Although her massive ego and pride might get in the way of doing something for her family. That was likely something that she got from her mother as well.

"That's easy," she said. "I'd leave him to rot."

"You're not serious?"

Annabeth's gray eyes fixed on me. She wore the same expression she'd worn in the woods at camp, the moment she drew her sword against the hellhound. "My dad's resented me since the day I was born, Percy," she said. "He never wanted a baby. When he got me, he asked Athena to take me back and raise me on Olympus because he was too busy with his work. She wasn't happy about that. She told him heroes had to be raised by their mortal parent."

"You've got to be fucking kidding me. Why the fuck are you such a little cunt Annie. So he didn't want to raise you, it's not like he beat you or anything. Hell, even if he didn't like you then it's been years since you last talked to him right? So he most likely changed his mind at this point."

This girl didn't even know how lucky she was compared to me. I can't believe she was playing the bad life card to me of all people. Gabe would be laughing in my face right now.

"I appeared on my father's doorstep, in a golden cradle, carried down from Olympus by Zephyr the West Wind. You'd think my dad would remember that as a miracle, right? Like, maybe he'd take some digital photos or something. But he always talked about my arrival as if it were the most inconvenient thing that had ever happened to him. When I was five he got married and totally forgot about Athena. He got a 'regular' mortal wife, and had two 'regular' mortal kids, and tried to pretend I didn't exist." She ranted out toward me, as if it would get me to understand how she felt.

I stared out the train window, formulating my opinion on this.

"You don't even fucking understand how lucky you are you stupid bitch. So what if he pretended you didn't exist, you were still feed, given a room, most likely had some quality of life. I'm not sure what you thought you would get from telling me this, but it's not sympathy. You seem, like the type who would just make that shit up for attention anyway. Getting a bit of extra attention from the sympathy card with those half siblings of yours."

Annabeth kept worrying at her necklace, glaring at me as though I'd killed her cat. She was pinching the gold college ring that hung with the beads. It occurred to me that the ring must be her father's. I wondered why she wore it if she hated him so much, only strengthening what I thought about the truthfulness of her story.

"He doesn't care about me!" she said, trying to convince me. "His wife—my stepmom—treated me like a freak. She wouldn't let me play with her children. My dad went along with her. Whenever something dangerous happened—you know, something with monsters—they would both look at me resentfully, like, 'How dare you put our family at risk.' Finally, I took the hint. I wasn't wanted. I ran away. "

"How old were you?" But my disbelief was still clear on my face.

"Same age as when I started camp. Seven."

"So you really could have been imagining it all because your memories and mental abilities are so fucking high when you are seven. Just great"

"What the hell Percy, what have I done to get you to hate me so much!" She finally broke out.

I glared at her before giving a twisted smirk, "Well, the fact that you don't notice how good you have it, the fact you are fucking stupid, the fact that you are something like an entitled little brat, the fact you have others wrapped around your little finger as though you've been through shit when you really haven't… Just everything about you makes you a fake ass bitch. Let me tell you Annie, you ain't got shit on me and what I've been through. You've had a life that was practically a walk in the park."

With that I went silent, just smirking at her, practically daring her to say something else to me as I listened to the sound of Grover snoring and gazed out the train windows as the dark fields of Ohio raced by.

Toward the end of our second day on the train, June 13, eight days before the summer solstice, we passed through some golden hills and over the Mississippi River into St. Louis. Annabeth craned her neck to see the Gateway Arch, which looked to me like a huge shopping bag handle stuck on the city.

"I want to do that," she sighed.

"What?" I asked, but honestly I wanted to do nothing more than ignore her.

Why can't she get the all the clues that I was giving her. I didn't like her, so she should stop talking to me. What could she possibly gain from my continued insults that she wanted to continue to talk to me?

"Build something like that. You ever see the Parthenon, Percy?"

"Only in pictures."

"Someday, I'm going to see it in person. I'm going to build the greatest monument to the gods, ever. Something that'll last a thousand years."

I laughed. "You? An architect?"

She was a demigod, with ADHD; she couldn't sit around and do fucking planning all day. Once again it was proved that the daughter of Athena was an idiot.

Her cheeks flushed. "Yes, an architect. Athena expects her children to create things, not just tear them down, like a certain god of earthquakes I could mention."

"Yes, because my father doesn't have a whole realm under the ocean which he created and takes care of, ruling every day. God you are such a fucking idiot, especially considering your mother tore apart families by killing people by CREATING THE FUCKING GORGONS. There are plenty of other examples as well. Your mother isn't some fucking hero Annie, face it already for fucks sake."

There was a stinging sensation on my cheek, and at first I couldn't believe it. This woman did not just slap me like I was her bitch, fuck no.

Glaring at her I spoke harshly, "That's your fucking one shot brain bitch. Do it again I fucking dare you. I'm not your bitch you can just slap around when I do something you don't like. If you don't want to face the facts, fine no skin off my back, but don't take it out on me."

Our conversation was interrupted as we pulled into the Amtrak station downtown. The intercom told us we'd have a three-hour layover before departing for Denver. Annie seemed to drop it, at least for now. However I could see the rage in her eyes, and it practically made me gleeful that I put it there.

Grover stretched. Before he was even fully awake, he said, "Food."

"Come on, goat boy," Annabeth said. "Sightseeing."

"Sightseeing?"

"The Gateway Arch," she said. "This may be my only chance to ride to the top. Are you coming or not?"

Grover and I exchanged looks.

I wanted to say no, I really should say no. However if I did that and started to argue with her I would simply upset Grover, and I didn't want my friend to have to be our middle man.

That didn't make my foreboding feeling go away.

Grover shrugged. "As long as there's a snack bar without monsters."

The Arch was about a mile from the train station. Late in the day the lines to get in weren't that long. We threaded our way through the underground museum, looking at covered wagons and other junk from the 1800s. It wasn't all that thrilling, but Annabeth kept telling us interesting facts about how the Arch was built, and Grover kept passing me jelly beans, so I was okay, especially when I was given the blue ones.

I kept looking around, though, at the other people in line. "You smell anything?" I murmured to Grover.

He took his nose out of the jelly-bean bag long enough to sniff. "Underground," he said distastefully. "Under ground air always smells like monsters. Probably doesn't mean anything."

But something felt wrong to me. I had a feeling we shouldn't be here, fucking maybe I should have bitched it out with Annie back on the surface.

I'd almost mastered my jumpy nerves a few minutes later, when I saw the tiny little elevator car we were going to ride to the top of the Arch, and I knew I was in trouble. I hate confined places. They make me nuts.

We got shoehorned into the car with this big fat lady and her dog, a Chihuahua with a rhinestone collar. I figured maybe the dog was a seeing-eye Chihuahua, because none of the guards said a word about it, and I tried to mentally restrain _some_ of my sarcasm.

We started going up, inside the Arch. I'd never been in an elevator that went in a curve, and my stomach wasn't too happy about it, I wasn't made to be high. This wasn't going to end well for me.

"No parents?" the fat lady asked us.

She had beady eyes; pointy, coffee-stained teeth; a floppy denim hat, and a denim dress that bulged so much, she looked like a blue-jean blimp.

"They're below," Annabeth told her. "Scared of heights."

"Oh, the poor darlings."

The Chihuahua growled. The woman said, "Now, now, Sonny. Behave." The dog had beady eyes like its owner, intelligent and vicious.

I said, "Sonny. Is that his name?"

"No," the lady told me.

She smiled, as if that cleared everything up. I however frowned, something was defiantly was wrong with this picture.

At the top of the Arch, the observation deck reminded me of a tin can with carpeting. Rows of tiny windows looked out over the city on one side and the river on the other. The view was okay, but if there's anything I like less than a confined space, it's a confined space six hundred feet in the air. I was ready to go pretty quick, before Zeus shot me down.

Why Annabeth thought it was an okay idea to bring the Sea God's son up so high was beyond me.

Annabeth kept talking about structural supports, and how she would've made the windows bigger, and designed a see-through floor.

She probably could've stayed up there for hours, but luckily for me the park ranger announced that the observation deck would be closing in a few minutes.

I steered Grover and Annabeth toward the exit, loaded them into the elevator, and I was about to get in myself when I realized there were already two other tourists inside. No room for me.

The park ranger said, "Next car, sir."

"We'll get out," Annabeth said. "We'll wait with you."

But that was going to mess everybody up and take even more time, so I said, "Naw, its okay. I'll see you guys at the bottom."

Grover and Annabeth both looked nervous, but they let the elevator door slide shut. Their car disappeared down the ramp, and I almost immediately regretted it.

Now the only people left on the observation deck were me, a little boy with his parents, the park ranger, and the fat lady with her Chihuahua.

I smiled uneasily at the fat lady. She smiled back, her forked tongue flickering between her teeth.

Wait a minute.

Forked tongue? Holy fucking shit, this bitch had a fucking forked tongue. That didn't mean good things for me, shit I should have listened to my instincts.

Her Chihuahua jumped down and started yapping at me, nearly the minute that I had noticed something wrong with the woman.

"Now, now, Sonny," the lady said. "Does this look like a good time? We have all these nice people here."

"Doggie!" said the little boy. "Look, a doggie!"

His parents pulled him back.

The Chihuahua bared his teeth at me, foam dripping from his black lips.

"Well, son," the fat lady sighed. "If you insist."

Ice started forming in my stomach. "Urn, did you just call that Chihuahua your son?"

_"Chimera,_dear," the fat lady corrected. "Not a Chihuahua. It's an easy mistake to make."

She rolled up her denim sleeves, revealing that the skin of her arms was scaly and green. When she smiled, I saw that her teeth were fangs. The pupils of her eyes were sideways slits, like a reptile's.

Oh my fucking gods. Now, my mother taught me the barest of Greek mythology but I still have a fucking clue and it wasn't good.

The Chihuahua barked louder, and with each bark, it grew. First to the size of a Doberman, then to a lion. The bark became a roar.

The little boy screamed. His parents pulled him back toward the exit, straight into the park ranger, who stood, paralyzed, gaping at the monster.

The Chimera was now so tall it's back rubbed against the roof. It had the head of a lion with a blood-caked mane, the body and hooves of a giant goat, and a serpent for a tail, a ten-foot-long diamondback growing right out of its shaggy behind. The rhinestone dog collar still hung around its neck, and the plate-sized dog tag was now easy to read: CHIMERA—RABID, FIRE-BREATHING, POISONOUS—IF FOUND, PLEASE CALL TARTARUS—EXT. 954.

What was this sense of humour, like really, who made that tag?

I realized I hadn't even uncapped my sword. My hands were numb. I was ten feet away from the Chimera's bloody maw, and I knew that as soon as I moved, the creature would lunge. It didn't leave me many options, and shit I wished I had brain bitch here.

At least I could push her forward and let Chimera have a snack well I made a run for it.

The snake lady made a hissing noise that might've been laughter. "Be honored, Percy Jackson. Lord Zeus rarely allows me to test a hero with one of my brood. For I am the Mother of Monsters, the terrible Echidna!"

I stared at her, my mind racing with the implications of what she had spoken, but all I could think to say back was: "Isn't that a kind of anteater?... I see the resemblance."

She howled, her reptilian face turning brown and green with rage. "I hate it when people say that! I hate Australia! Naming that ridiculous animal after me. For that, Percy Jackson, my son shall destroy you!"

The Chimera charged, its lion teeth gnashing. I managed to leap aside and dodge the bite, trying to formulate a plan.

I ended up next to the family and the park ranger, who were all screaming now, trying to pry open the emergency exit doors.

I couldn't let them get hurt because the gods were fucking stupid as shit and couldn't take care of their own problems.

I uncapped my sword, ran to the other side of the deck, and yelled, "Hey, Chihuahua!" The Chimera turned faster than I would've thought possible.

Before I could swing my sword, it opened its mouth, emitting a stench like the world's largest barbecue pit, and shot a column of flame straight at me.

I dove through the explosion. The carpet burst into flames; the heat was so intense, it nearly seared off my eye brows.

Where I had been standing a moment before was a ragged hole in the side of the Arch, with melted metal steaming around the edges.

_Great_, I thought. _We just blow torched a national monument; I'm going to be going down in the history books._

Riptide was now a shining bronze blade in my hands, and as the Chimera turned, I slashed at its neck.

That was my fatal mistake. The blade sparked harmlessly off the dog collar. I tried to regain my balance, but I was so worried about defending myself against the fiery lion's mouth, I completely forgot about the serpent tail until it whipped around and sank its fangs into my calf.

My whole leg was on fire. I quickly slashed down toward the snake's head, intent on stopping the flow of poison, and at least harming the monster. I did one thing; I cut the head right off the body. The head however was still moving.

The poison was spreading, and all I could think about was my stupidity, of course the head would stay and continue to poison me. I learned that on animal channel when I was five. Quickly pulling the head off with the tip of my sword while the Chimera howled in pain.

I managed to get to my feet, but I knew I had lost. I could feel deadly poison racing up to my chest; all I could think about was what a bitch it was to be dying before I even got to find out if my mother cared about me after all.

I backed into the hole in the wall. The Chimera advanced, growling, smoke curling from its lips and obviously over its pain, instead choosing to be pissed off at the loss of a piece of itself. The snake lady, Echidna, cackled. "You might have hurt my son, but you will not win. They don't make heroes like they used to I suppose."

The monster growled. It seemed in no hurry to finish me off now that I was beaten, apparently wanting to drag this out as long as possible.

I glanced at the park ranger and the family. The little boy was hiding behind his father's legs. I had to protect these people. I couldn't just ... die. I still have shit to do, people to see, Gabe to kill, Annie to fuck with, my dad to bond with, my mother to find. I had so much I still wanted to do…

I tried to think, but my whole body was on fire. My head felt dizzy. I had no sword, I dropped it at some point in pain, and I couldn't concentrate enough to bring myself to find it.

There was no place else to go, so I stepped to the edge of the hole. Far, far below, the river glittered.

If I died, would the monsters go away? Would they leave the humans alone?

"If you are the son of Poseidon," Echidna hissed, "you would not fear water. Jump, Percy Jackson. Show me that water will not harm you. Jump and prove your bloodline."

Yeah, right, I thought. I'd read somewhere that jumping into water from a couple of stories up was like jumping onto solid asphalt. From here, I'd splatter on impact.

The Chimera's mouth glowed red, heating up for another blast.

Then again, it couldn't be worse than burning to death. My father cared about me somewhat after all, he'd visited me. Perhaps because I was son of a Sea God such rules would be bent.

"You have no faith," Echidna told me. "You do not trust the gods. I cannot blame you, little coward. Better you die now. The gods are faithless. The poison is in your heart."

She was right: I was dying. I could feel my breath slowing down. Yet if I was to have faith in anyone, shouldn't a boy have faith in his father. As hard as it was to think, I knew it was better than the alternative…

I backed up and looked down at the water. I remembered the warm glow of my father's smile when I was a baby. He must have seen me. He must have visited me when I was in my cradle, I just couldn't stop thinking about it right now.

I remembered the swirling green trident that had appeared above my head the night of capture the flag, when Poseidon had claimed me as his son.

"Die, faithless one," Echidna rasped, and the Chimera sent a column of flame toward my face.

"Father, help me," I prayed, showing the fact that I did indeed have faith.

I turned and jumped. My clothes on fire, poison coursing through my veins, I plummeted toward the river.

END CHAPTER

Author Note: **Read and review** please~ Let me know what you think and etcetc. Suggestions are always welcome as well.


	5. I Become a Know Fugitive

Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson

Warnings: ****Language is going to be strong**.** If you have a problem with it I suggest not reading it. I'll rate this fic at T for now, but with a possibly of it rising higher than that in the future.

Summary: Percy had enough of bending to other people, be it Gods or Gabe. The Sea didn't like being restrained, and neither did Percy. It was time for make a change for the better and be his own person. Different!Badass!Swearing!Cool!Percy

Author Note: Alright~ an update for once. It's been sometime – But this is one of my favourite stories so I wouldn't just abandon it. This chapter was hard I tell you! So little actual talking, it's hard to fit anything much different. So yeah it's boring, and because of that ~~~~ you will get** another chapter on Saturday or Sunday**. I'll work my cute little fingers off, all for you guys~ who's looking forward to Ares and Percy's meeting. *Raises hand*

Chapter Five: I Become a Know Fugitive

Wouldn't I love love to tell you I got some deep revelation on my way down, that I came to terms with my own mortality, laughed in the face of death, that I regretting dying a virgin. Etcetc.

The truth?

My only thought was: Fuuuuuccccckkk!

The river raced toward me at the speed of a truck. Wind ripped the breath from my lungs (which actually felt kind of cool thinking back on it), I felt like I couldn't move never mind breathe or even _think_. Steeples and skyscrapers and bridges tumbled in and out of my vision in a haze of all too fast movement.

And then: KAAA-PLUNNNK!

A whiteout of bubbles. I sank through the murk, sure that I had been sure that I was going to become a pancake, so the fact that I was sinking was a good sign right?

But my impact with the water hadn't hurt, guess I had father for that. Defying laws of physics, definitely god related.

I was falling slowly now, bubbles trickling up through my fingers. I settled on the river bottom softly. A catfish the size of my stepfather lurched away into the gloom. Clouds of silt and disgusting garbage beer bottles, old shoes, plastic bags swirled up all around me, king of the trash I suppose.

At that point, I realized a few things:

I had my eyes open, the entire time. Pretty sure that should have fucked them up, must be the god hacks powers again.

This river was fucking nasty. Seriously, they need to clean this thing – How it got in such a bad state was anyone's guess but it was fucking disgusting.

I had not been barbecued. I couldn't even feel the Chimera poison boiling in my veins anymore. I was alive, which was good.

I wasn't wet.

I mean, I could feel the coolness of the water. I could see where the fire on my clothes had been quenched. But when I touched my own shirt, it felt perfectly dry.

As far as super powers go it wasn't the coolest, but I also wasn't going to complain about not touching this sludge you could barely classify as water.

I looked at the garbage floating by and snatched an old cigarette lighter. I flicked the lighter. It sparked. A tiny flame appeared, right there at the bottom of the Mississippi. Great daddy very useful, if I ever need to light a fire at the bottom of the river you totally got that covered.

I grabbed a soggy hamburger wrapper out of the current and immediately the paper turned dry, which really made me want to let it go but it was experiment time. I lit it with no problem. As soon as I let it go, the flames sputtered out. The wrapper turned back into a slimy rag.

This was just fucking weird.

But the strangest thought occurred to me only last: I was breathing. I was underwater, and I was breathing normally. I was breathing in this shit hole, looking around me I knew that I did NOT want to be breathing. What if I got some piece of trash coming in the wrong pipe?

I stood up, thigh-deep in mud, and I didn't even want to know what the fuck this 'mud' was comprised of.

My legs felt shaky, must have been the near death experience. My hands trembled. I should've been dead, not that I wasn't glad to be alive.

The fact that I wasn't seemed like ... well, a miracle, as I'd already thought, but what else could my adrenalin addled brain do. I imagined a woman's voice, a voice that sounded a bit like my mother: Percy, what do you say?

Well, it seemed that thought was a sign. A sign that I owed someone a non-sarcastic apology.

"Um ... thanks." Underwater, I sounded somewhat garbled, to be expected I supposed. "Thank you ... Father."

No response. Just the dark drift of garbage downriver, my faint thought that I was going to redub this river 'Garbage River', the enormous catfish gliding by, obviously the result of some kind of fucked up mutation from the sludge, the flash of sunset on the water's surface far above, turning everything the color of butterscotch.

Why had Poseidon saved me?

Better not to question it and just be glad that I was before the guy decided to stop my wondrous Garbage River walking skills.

Those poor people in the Arch were probably toasted. Though I did hope that my jumping allowed them to get away.

Fump-fump-fump. A riverboat's paddlewheel churned above me, swirling the silt around, I entertained the idea of just how much cleaning that boat must need after running in the trash all day.

There, not five feet in front of me, was my sword, its gleaming bronze hilt sticking up in the mud, how horribly convenient. Best not question a good thing.

I heard that woman's voice again: _Percy, take the sword. Your father believes in you._

Okay imaginary voice, I'll take the sword. Not like I wanted to go weaponless, not that fucking stupid. Guess it was nice to know that my attitude change hadn't pissed Daddy off though, seemed he still _believes in me._

Then, through the gloom, I saw her, a woman the color of the water, a ghost in the current, floating just above the sword. She had long billowing hair, and her eyes, barely visible, were green like mine.

I knew at that point I must have been imagining things.

A lump formed in my throat. I said, "Mom?"

_No, child, only a messenger, though your mother's fate is not as hopeless as you believe. Go to the beach in Santa Monica._

"What?"

Great, his father was sending him away from the quest? Sure there must be a reason behind it; maybe it was a good thing. No reason not to stay away from the trip to the underworld that was more than likely to get him killed.

_It is your father's will. Before you descend into the Underworld, you must go to Santa Monica. Please, Percy, I cannot stay long. The river here is too foul for my presence._

Yeah no shit the river is foul. State the fucking obvious.

"But ..." I was sure this woman was my mother, or a vision of her, anyway. "Who how did you-"

There was so much I wanted to ask, the words jammed up in my throat. I really hoped that was from the fucked up situation and not any of the smudge getting in there.

_I cannot stay, brave one_, the woman said. She reached out, and I felt the current brush my face like a caress.

_You must go to Santa Monica! And, Percy, do not trust the gifts_...

Her voice faded, just who is that anyway. Looks like my mother, gives horrible cryptic hints. I had the feeling that might end up being common place in this whole new world.

Great…

"Gifts?" I asked. "What gifts you cryptic bitch!? Wait!"

She made one more attempt to speak, but the sound was gone. Her image melted away. If it was my mother, I had lost her again. Of course it wasn't my mother, my uncle wouldn't let go of her that easy. The illusion was nice to believe though.

I almost felt like drowning myself. The only problem: I was immune to drowning, well that and if I was going to do that I didn't want to die in this piece of shit river.

Your father believes in you, she had said.

She'd also called me brave ... unless she was talking to the catfish. I personally think brave sometimes counts as just plain stupid, so who knows what she meant upon saying it.

I waded toward Riptide and grabbed it by the hilt. The Chimera might still be up there with its snaky, fat mother, waiting to finish me off. At the very least, the mortal police would be arriving, trying to figure out who had blown a hole in the Arch, hopefully I get credit for that – I'd be fucking awesome.

I capped my sword, stuck the ballpoint pen in my pocket. "Thank you, Father," I said again to the dark water.

Then I kicked up through the muck which didn't seem to want to let me go, and swam for the surface.

I came ashore next to a floating McDonald's, extremely glad that I was no longer completely in that muck and I could go for a burger. Probably wasn't a great time for that though.

A block away, every emergency vehicle in St. Louis was surrounding the Arch. Police helicopters circled overhead. The crowd of onlookers reminded me of Times Square on New Year's Eve.

A little girl said, "Mama! That boy walked out of the river."

"That's nice, dear," her mother said, craning her neck to watch the ambulances. I gave the girl thumbs up and a wide grin before putting my finger to my lips. Universal sign of be quiet, of course she didn't listen.

"But he's dry!"

"That's nice, dear."

Thank Zeus for stupid, distracted mothers.

A news lady was talking for the camera: "Probably not a terrorist attack, we're told, but it's still very early in the investigation. The damage, as you can see, is very serious. We're trying to get to some of the survivors, to question them about eyewitness reports of someone falling from the Arch."

Survivors. I felt a surge of relief. Maybe the park ranger and that family made it out safely. I hoped Annie and Grover were okay.

Okay maybe Annie could bite it and I wouldn't care all that much.

I tried to push through the crowd to see what was going on inside the police line.

"... An adolescent boy," another reporter was saying. "Channel Five has learned that surveillance cameras show an adolescent boy going wild on the observation deck, somehow setting off this freak explosion. Hard to believe, John, but that's what we're hearing. Again, no confirmed fatalities-"

I backed away, trying to keep my head down. I had to go a long way around the police perimeter. Uniformed officers and news reporters were everywhere. I was going to be a fucking legend. Could be better though, like instead of being the person who caused everything was the one that handsomely fought for the family to be free. Guess that's what I get for wishing for fame.

Of course if they caught me it might not be that great, I said it before and I'll say it again, this ass is too nice for jail.

I'd almost lost hope of ever finding Annie and Grover when a familiar voice bleated from the top of his lungs, "Perrr-cy!"

I turned and got tackled by Grover's bear hug or goat hug. Honestly I could barely breathe, who knew Grover was hiding so much arm strength.

He said, "We thought you'd gone to Hades the hard way!"

Gee, thanks for keeping out hope for me.

Annabeth stood behind him, trying to look angry, but even she seemed relieved to see me. I was less than relieved to see her myself.

"We can't leave you alone for five minutes! What happened?"

"I sort of fell." Guess that was better than saying I attempted a suicide jump off the damn thing.

"Percy! Six hundred and thirty feet?"

Behind us, a cop shouted, "Gangway!" The crowd parted like the sea, and a couple of paramedics hustled out, rolling a woman on a stretcher.

I wondered why she was only now getting onto that stretcher, had they made her walk all the way down. Those assholes, only fun part of going to a hospital was going to be the fact she didn't have to walk anywhere!

Either way, I recognized her immediately as the mother of the little boy who'd been on the observation deck. She was saying, "And then this huge dog, this huge fire-breathing Chihuahua-"

"Okay, ma'am," the paramedic said. "Just calm down. Your family is fine. The medication is starting to kick in."

"I'm not crazy! This boy jumped out of the hole and the monster disappeared." Then she saw me. "There he is! That's the boy!"

I turned quickly and pulled Brain Bitch and Grover after me. We disappeared into the crowd. Well, at least my plan worked.

"What's going on?" Annie demanded in that demanding, _annoying_ tone of hers. "Was she talking about the Chihuahua on the elevator?"

I told them the whole story of the Chimera, the Anteater, my high-dive act, and the underwater lady's message, and most importantly the new river name.

"Whoa," said Grover. "We've got to get you to Santa Monica! You can't ignore a summons from your dad."

Before the brainiac could respond, we passed another reporter doing a news break, and I almost froze in my tracks when he said, "Percy Jackson. That's right, Dan. Channel Twelve has learned that the boy who may have caused this explosion fits the description of a young man wanted by authorities for a serious New Jersey bus accident three days ago and the boy is believed to be traveling west. For our viewers at home, here is a photo of Percy Jackson."

We ducked around the news van and slipped into an alley. My mother would be so proud of my new life of crime. At least I went big, if you were going to do it, do it right.

Yeah that's right, I was a badass.

"First things first," I told Grover. "We've got to get out of town!"

Somehow, we made it back to the Amtrak station without getting spotted, perhaps the mist decided to do something other than cause be problems for once. We got on board the train just before it pulled out for Denver. The train trundled west as darkness fell, police lights still pulsing against the St. Louis skyline behind us.

End~

Author Note: Please **reviewww**~


	6. A God Buy's us Cheeseburgers

Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson

Warnings: Language is going to be strong. If you have a problem with it I suggest not reading it. I'll rate this fic at T for now, but with a possibly of it rising higher than that in the future.

Summary: Percy had enough of bending to other people, be it Gods or Gabe. The Sea didn't like being restrained, and neither did Percy. It was time for make a change for the better and be his own person. Different!Badass!Swearing!Cool!Percy

Author Note: Alright, as promised the next chapter, let me know what you think and such. **Review~**

* * *

><p>Chapter Five: A God Buy's us Cheeseburgers<p>

The next afternoon, June 14, seven days before the solstice, our train rolled into Denver. The time crunch was feeling much more real with every hour that past.

We hadn't eaten since the night before in the dining car, somewhere in Kansas. We hadn't taken a shower since Half-Blood Hill, and I was sure that was obvious. Honestly I was about two seconds away from attempting to steal from someone's suitcase or finding a shop to hold up. These quests were unsanitary; this wasn't the middle ages anymore.

"Let's try to contact Chiron," Annie said. "I want to tell him about your talk with the river spirit."

"We can't use phones, right?"

"I'm not talking about phones."

We, the dream team (sarcasm at its finest) wandered through downtown for about half an hour, though I wasn't sure what Brain Bitch was looking for, it was starting to get quite annoying. Perhaps if she would just clue us in, we could have had this over with already.

The air was dry and hot, everywhere we turned; the Rocky Mountains seemed to be staring at me, like a tidal wave about to crash into the city.

I was also starting to think being son of a sea god as having more effect on the way that I thought then I'd known. I compared almost everything to water related things; it was actually kind of creepy now that I noticed I was doing it.

Finally we found an empty do-it-yourself car wash. We veered toward the stall farthest from the street, keeping our eyes open for patrol cars. We were three adolescents hanging out at a car wash without a car; any cop worth his doughnuts would figure we were up to no good. Not to mention I was splashed on a whole shitload of TV's all over the country as the kid that blew up part of a building.

"What exactly are we doing?" I asked, as Grover took out the spray gun, honestly bewildered by the situation.

"Its seventy-five cents," he grumbled. "I've only got two quarters left. Annabeth?"

"Don't look at me," she said. "The dining car wiped me out."

I fished out my last bit of change and passed Grover a quarter, which left me two nickels and one drachma from Medusa's place.

"Excellent," Grover said. "We could do it with a spray bottle, of course, but the connection isn't as good, and my arm gets tired of pumping."

"What are you talking about?"

He fed in the quarters and set the knob to FINE MIST. "I-M'ing."

"Instant messaging?"

"Iris-messaging," Annabeth corrected. "The rainbow goddess Iris carries messages for the gods. If you know how to ask, and she's not too busy, she'll do the same for half-bloods."

I wish she could have explained this when she was meant to be teaching me the basics at camp. Seriously, why wasn't this sort of thing part of the beginner's packet?

"You summon the goddess with a spray gun?" I drawled out sarcastically, not exactly wanting to feel so shamed in my lack of knowledge compared to Brain Bitch. I wouldn't be that way forever though, I internally promised myself.

Grover pointed the nozzle in the air and water hissed out in a thick white mist. "Unless you know an easier way to make a rainbow."

Sure enough, late afternoon light filtered through the vapor and broke into colors.

Annabeth held her palm out to me. "Drachma, please."

I handed it over, completely put out. Even when she was asking for something seemingly politely, the 'I'm superior to you' tone somehow still leaked out.

She raised the coin over her head. "O goddess, accept our offering."

She threw the drachma into the rainbow. It disappeared in a golden shimmer.

"Half-Blood Hill," Annabeth requested.

For a moment, nothing happened.

"Good going Brain Bitch, you broke it."

Then I was looking through the mist at strawberry fields, and the Long Island Sound in the distance. We seemed to be on the porch of the Big House. Standing with his back to us at the railing was a sandy-haired guy in shorts and an orange tank top. He was holding a bronze sword and seemed to be staring intently at something down in the meadow.

"Oh, never mind seemed I jumped the fun. Sorry brainiac." Before I called out, "Luke!"

He turned eyes wide. I could swear he was standing three feet in front of me through a screen of mist, except I could only see the part of him that appeared in the rainbow. Honestly it was a little bit creepy, guess I'd just have to get used to it.

"Percy!" His scarred face broke into a grin. "Is that Annabeth, too? Thank the gods! Are you guys okay?"

"We're ... uh ... fine," Annie stammered. She was madly straightening her dirty T-shirt, trying to comb the loose hair out of her face.

Someone had a huge crush, honestly though it would have been better to play it off as the badass that just got out of battle instead of the pretty girl trying to get cleaned up. For some reason I got the feeling Luke would like the girl that could take care of themselves more than someone who sits around for him to save the day. He was good looking enough; if he wanted someone too pretty he could have anyone from the Love Goddess' cabin.

"We thought Chiron I mean-"

"He's down at the cabins." Luke's smile faded. "We're having some issues with the campers. Listen, is everything cool with you? Is Grover all right?"

"I'm right here," Grover called. He held the nozzle out to one side and stepped into Luke's line of vision. "What kind of issues?"

Just then a big Lincoln Continental pulled into the car wash with its stereo turned to maximum hip-hop.

As the car slid into the next stall, the bass from the subwoofers vibrated so much, it shook the pavement.

"Chiron had to what's that noise?" Luke yelled.

"I'll take care of it." Annabeth yelled back, looking very relieved to have an excuse to get out of sight.

"Grover, come on!"

Seriously? She was taking Grover with her to straighten up. I realllllllly tried to keep in my exasperated sigh I reeaaaaaallllllyyyy did.

"What?" Grover said. "But-"

"Give Percy the nozzle and come on!" she ordered.

Grover muttered something about girls being harder to understand than the Oracle at Delphi, something which I could agree with. Then he handed me the spray gun and followed Annabeth.

I readjusted the hose so I could keep the rainbow going and still see Luke.

"Chiron had to break up a fight," Luke shouted to me over the music. "Things are pretty tense here, Percy. Word leaked out about the Zeus Poseidon standoff. We're still not sure how, probably the same scumbag who summoned the hellhound. Now the campers are starting to take sides. It's shaping up like the Trojan War all over again. Aphrodite, Ares, and Apollo are backing Poseidon, more or less. Athena is backing Zeus. The rest are staying out of it, however they lean more toward Poseidon as well."

I snorted; of course Athena would be backing Zeus. She certainly seemed like the kiss up type. Even though she was supposedly smart enough to figure out it was impossible for Poseidon to have stolen it, she wouldn't face the music that came from facing off against her father.

In the next stall, I heard Annabeth and some guy arguing with each other, and then the music's volume decreased drastically. If it was me in that guys place, I would have turned it louder to drown out the sound of Brain Bitch's voice.

"So what's your status?" Luke asked me. "Chiron will be sorry he missed you."

I told him pretty much everything, excluding my dreams and anything that I thought personally. Just the plain and straight facts. Last thing I needed was someone else on my ass because I said something that I shouldn't have – Better to keep it close to the vest so to speak.

It felt so good to see him, to feel like I was back at camp even for a few minutes (and that camp had felt dramatically like home), that I didn't realize how long I had talked until the beeper went off on the spray machine, and I realized I only had one more minute before the water shut off.

"I wish I could be there," Luke told me. "We can't help much from here, I'm afraid, but listen ... it had to be Hades who took the master bolt. He was there at Olympus at the winter solstice. I was chaperoning a field trip and we saw him."

"But Chiron said the gods can't take each other's magic items directly. Also, he is one of the people with the least to gain from all of this. Also, even if it was him we should look at all other possibilities thoroughly before we go around accusing the God of the Underworld."

"That's true," Luke said, looking troubled. "Still ... Hades has the helm of darkness. How could anybody else sneak into the throne room and steal the master bolt? You'd have to be invisible."

We were both silent, until Luke seemed to realize what he'd said.

My mind flew to Brain Bitch. I hated her, I truly did, however I didn't think it was her. In fact I was sure that it wasn't, that however didn't mean that I couldn't draw other conclusions. If Hades could turn invisible, and Annie-Bitch could too, then who knew who else could. Truly it didn't narrow anything down at all.

"Oh, hey," he protested. "I didn't mean Annabeth. She and I have known each other forever. She would never ... I mean, she's like a little sister to me."

I snickered, like a sister huh? That's what you get Brain Bitch.

In the stall next to us, the music stopped completely. A man screamed in terror, car doors slammed, and the Lincoln peeled out of the car wash. That did NOT sound good.

"You'd better go see what that was," Luke said. "Listen, are you wearing the flying shoes? I'll feel better if I know they've done you some good."

"Mhmm, Yeah, they've come in handy. Little bit hard to control still but hey, you can get used to just about anything." It was a lie of course, they hadn't come in useful.

"Really?" He grinned. "They fit and everything?"

The water shut off. The mist started to evaporate.

"Well, take care of yourself out there in Denver," Luke called, his voice getting fainter. "And tell Grover it'll be better this time! Nobody will get turned into a pine tree if he just-"

But the mist was gone, and Luke's image faded to nothing. I was alone in a wet, empty car wash stall.

Annabeth and Grover came around the corner, laughing, but stopped when they saw my face. Annabeth's smile faded. "What happened, Percy? What did Luke say?"

"Not much," I lied, my stomach feeling quite hollow. These quests truly were dangerous. Still, I had a bad feeling about what Luke was saying, and I also knew better than to bring it up. Last thing that we need is any more in fighting when I was already bitching it out with Annie.

"Come on, let's find some dinner."

A few minutes later, we were sitting at a booth in a gleaming chrome diner.

All around us, families were eating burgers and drinking malts and sodas.

Finally the waitress came over. She raised her eyebrow skeptically. "Well?"

I said, "We, um, want to order dinner."

"You kids have money to pay for it?"

Grover's lower lip quivered. I was afraid he would start bleating, or worse, start eating the linoleum.

Annie looked ready to pass out from hunger, and I reallllllly wanted to see that. Hopefully she would hit her head on something really hard on the way down.

I was trying to think up a sob story for the waitress I could totally make her fall hook line and sinker, when a rumble shook the whole building; a motorcycle the size of a baby elephant had pulled up to the curb.

All conversation in the diner stopped. The motorcycle's headlight glared red. Its gas tank had flames painted on it, and a shotgun holster riveted to either side, complete with shotguns. The seat was leather but leather that looked like ... well, Caucasian human skin.

The guy on the bike would've made pro wrestlers run for Mama. My mama totally could have taken him too. I smiled in pride at the thought, she sometimes too feisty for her own good.

He was dressed in a red muscle shirt and black jeans and a black leather duster, with a hunting knife strapped to his thigh. He wore red wraparound shades, and he had the cruelest, most brutal face I'd ever seen handsome, I guess, but wicked with an oily black crew cut and cheeks that were scarred from many, many fights.

The weird thing was, I felt like I'd seen his face somewhere before. Because of this I knew something was very off. Seems like the next bump in our quest road was walking into the diner.

As he walked into the diner, a hot, dry wind blew through the place.

All the people rose, as if they were hypnotized, but the biker waved his hand dismissively and they all sat down again. Everybody went back to their conversations. The waitress blinked, as if somebody had just pressed the rewind button on her brain. She asked us again, "You kids have money to pay for it?"

The biker said, "It's on me."

He slid into our booth, which was way too small for him, and crowded Annabeth against the window.

"Thanks man, I was just about ready to lie my way out of paying too." I said, acting completely fine with the situation.

He looked up at the waitress, who was gaping at him, and said, "Are you still here?"

He pointed at her, and she stiffened. She turned as if she'd been spun around, and then marched back toward the kitchen.

The biker looked at me. I couldn't see his eyes behind the red shades, but bad feelings started boiling in my stomach. Anger, resentment, bitterness. I wanted to hit a wall. I wanted to pick a fight with somebody. Who did this guy think he was?

That's when I knew. Ares then, how interesting that he would come and see us during an important quest like the one that we were already on. I forcefully calmed myself, wouldn't do good for the new image that I was going for if I just started breaking things would it. Plus the attention would end up with my ass in jail – I hate to rethink this for the third time but my ass is far too pretty for jail.

He gave me a wicked grin. "So you're old Seaweed's kid, huh?"

I should've been surprised, or scared, but instead I felt like I was looking at my stepdad, Gabe.

Forcing myself to calm down again I gave a smirk. "What's it to you?"

Annabeth's eyes flashed me a warning. "Percy, this is-"

Really Brain Bitch, of course I fucking know who this is. How could you miss the aura that filled the room the second that he walked in? Just how stupid did she think I was?

The biker raised his hand, stopping Annie mid-sentence.

"S'okay," he said. "I don't mind a little attitude. Long as you remember who's the boss. You know who I am, little cousin?"

"You're Clarisse's dad, Ares, god of War. Nice to meet you…. Big cousin?" I raised an eyebrow toward the man, or would god be the more fitting word there.

Ares grinned and took off his shades. Where his eyes should've been, there was only fire, empty sockets glowing with miniature nuclear explosions. "That's right, punk. I heard you broke Clarisse's spear."

"She was asking for it."

"Probably. That's cool. I don't fight my kids' fights, you know? What I'm here for I heard you were in town. I got a little proposition for you."

The waitress came back with heaping trays of food cheeseburgers, fries, onion rings, and chocolate shakes. Right off the bat I grabbed a chocolate shake and some onion rings.

Ares handed her a few gold drachmas.

She looked nervously at the coins. "But, these aren't..."

Ares pulled out his huge knife and started cleaning his fingernails. "Problem, sweetheart?"

The waitress swallowed, then left with the gold. I just gave a small snicker.

"Wish I could do that, but my figure isn't quite as imposing as yours."

Ares laughed. "I love this country. Best place since Sparta. I like you too cousin, that attitude of yours is refreshing and I have to say, those letters of yours were amusing. You should have seen Dad's reaction. I owe you one for that. Anyway I was hoping you and your crew here could do me a little side job."

"What favor could I do for a god?"

"Something a god doesn't have time to do himself. It's nothing much. I left my shield at an abandoned water park here in town. I was going on a little ... date with my girlfriend. We were interrupted. I left my shield behind. I want you to fetch it for me."

"Not sure I really want to know what you were doing there, please leave the suggestive tone out. You are speaking to children for god's sake." Sarcasm heavy on the tone, but in reality, I was thinking hard.

It was weird, that during such an important quest Ares would come along and offer something on the side. I was sure that wasn't common place, and there were plenty of kids at the camp that would beg for the quest.

The fire in his eye sockets glowed a little hotter.

"Oh yes, because I need to watch my words around you. Don't forget kid, I was there when those letters were read and you weren't exactly PG13. Back to business though, a God is giving you the chance to prove yourself: Will you prove yourself to be a coward?" He leaned forward. "Or maybe you only fight when there's a river to dive into, so your daddy can protect you."

I narrowed my eyes at the war god, "We already have a quest as you well know…. I'm willing to bet that dear Dad won't be too happy with the fact that you choose to delay us. How about this though – I'm willing to do this for you, all you have to do is give me two things. It's pretty simple really, means nothing to a god such as you."

Ares's fiery eyes made me see things, blood and smoke and corpses on the battlefield. Watching wars pass before my eyes, this however didn't make me back down any.

"I know all about your quest, punk. When that item was first stolen, Zeus sent his best out looking for it: Apollo, Athena, Artemis, and me, naturally. If I couldn't sniff out a weapon that powerful ..." He licked his lips, as if the very thought of the master bolt made him hungry. "Well ... if I couldn't find it, you got no hope. Nevertheless, I'm trying to give you the benefit of the doubt. Your dad and I go way back. After all, I'm the one who told him my suspicions about old Corpse Breath."

"You told him Hades stole the bolt?"

"Sure."

Framing somebody to start a war. Oldest trick in the book. I recognized it immediately; it also placed a lot of suspicion off of him. This made me start to bump Ares toward the top of my metal suspect list.

"In a way, you got me to thank for your little quest."

"Thanks, I couldn't have possibly lived without this fuckwad of a mission."

"Hey, I'm a generous guy. Just do my little job, and I'll help you on your way. I'll arrange a ride west for you and your friends."

"I'll do your job, as I just said. However you talking about being the one to sell Hades out hasn't made me forget what I said I wanted for payment. Simple really, two things: I want your jacket, and I want your shades."

"…. You are nothing like what I was expecting cousin. However I like this jacket, it takes awhile to find a nice duster. How about instead of the jacket, I'll tell you all you want to know about your mother."

Okay now the bastard was pissing me off. No powers involved in that, you just don't bring peoples mothers into negotiations like that.

"My mom, you don't know much about her. Sure you are a god, but that doesn't change the fact that the one that has the most information is Hades, and I'm heading down there. Your information won't be anywhere near as reliable. I'm wearing rags here, I look stupid in this shirt, and I want the shades and the jacket."

He scowled, but I like to think there was some respect in those burning eyes... "Fine, you can have the stupid jacket and glasses. You drive a hard bargain cousin; let's hope however that you made the right choice. The water park is a mile west on Delancy. You can't miss it. Look for the Tunnel of Love ride."

I knew I made the right choice. My mother was either dead, or taken by Hades. I wouldn't accept information that was second hand about something as important as my mother. I watched as he took of the jacket with a screwed up nose, seemed he really had liked it. Placing the jacket and the glasses on the table as he got up to head back to his bike.

"What interrupted your date?" I asked, trying to figure out just what I was heading into. "Something scare you off?"

Ares bared his teeth, but I'd seen his threatening look before on Clarisse. There was something false about it, almost like he was nervous. That of course, made me nervous – Anything that made a god of war nervous didn't mean well for me.

"You're lucky you met me, punk, and not one of the other Olympians. They're not as forgiving of rudeness as I am. I'll meet you back here when you're done. Don't disappoint me, and try not to ruin the jacket, you won't be able to find another like it."

After that I must have fainted, or fallen into a trance, because when I opened my eyes again, Ares was gone. I might've thought the conversation had been a dream, but Annabeth and Grover's expressions told me otherwise, as did the jacket and the glasses that were on the table. Gleefully I took them and put them on.

Badass factor plus 1000, still at -100 because of the fucking horrible coloured camp shirt, but it was much more workable now.

"Not good," Grover said. "Ares sought you out, Percy. This is not good. Not to mention you pushing him for his things like that, even more NOT good."

I stared out the window. The motorcycle had disappeared.

Did Ares really know something about my mom, or was he just playing with me?

"Alright, seems that we have a side quest. I'm not going to lie, totally worth the jacket."

"We can't," Annabeth said. "We don't have time for a side quest. I can't believe that you made a deal for a stupid jacket to take this quest when we were so pressed for time."

Her self righteous tone was ridiculous; she couldn't seriously be that stupid could she. Sure, it wasn't a great idea for us to take the quest, but what choice was there really. The guy could have just killed them for turning it down; instead he got something out of it for himself.

"Honestly, think whatever you want. Please use your brain before you open your mouth again. Anyway, I'm thinking that maybe the two quests are as separate as they seem. Ares seemed worried, but I guess the pieces will come together," I turned toward Grover and finished pointing toward Annie, Especially if brainiac pulls her brain out of her ass."

I looked down at my cheeseburger, which suddenly didn't seem so appetizing; sullenly I sucked down my shake. I kind of got the feeling that it might be my last meal so… At least it was junk food.

"Why does he need us?"

"Maybe it's a problem that requires brains,"

Annabeth said. "Ares has strength. That's all he has. Even strength has to bow to wisdom sometimes."

"But this water park ... he acted almost scared. What would make a war god run away like that? I also hope to god that by brains you DON'T mean you."

Annie and Grover glanced nervously at each other, Annie-Bitch seemed a little bit mad, however ignored me for the most part. Seems she was already growing a thicker skin, good. I might come to like her if she stops acting like an entitled spoiled brat.

Annie said, "I'm afraid we'll have to find out."

The sun was sinking behind the mountains by the time we found the water park. Judging from the sign, it once had been called WATERLAND, but now some of the letters were smashed out, so it read WAT R A D.

The main gate was padlocked and topped with barbed wire. Inside, huge dry waterslides and tubes and pipes curled everywhere, leading to empty pools. Old tickets and advertisements fluttered around the asphalt. With night coming on, the place looked sad and creepy.

"If Ares brings his girlfriend here for a date," I said, staring up at the barbed wire, "I'm guessing Daddy doesn't shell out money for that fancy council job."

"Percy," Annabeth warned. "Be more respectful."

"Why? I thought you hated Ares."

"He's still a god. And his girlfriend is very temperamental."

"You don't want to insult her looks," Grover added, which I knew thank you very much. I certainly didn't think that the Love Goddess was ugly…. Unless….

"You guys don't think that I don't know who it is… Do you? I'm not that stupid, it's fucking common knowledge even when you aren't at super hero camp. "

"Aphrodite," Grover said, a little dreamily. "Goddess of love."

Okay, maybe I could give Grover a pass for his thinking. It seemed quite a bit like he couldn't think clearly if the Goddess's name even entered his thoughts. Annie had no excuse though; maybe she was a lesbian or something.

"Personally one of my biggest issues and only issue with that whole situation is why they don't just get a divorce. Mythology says that Aphrodite and Heph don't love one another, it's the 21 century. Time to get your shit together." I drawled out, completely ready to ignore any farther comments on the situation. Honestly, none of my business.

"So how do we get in?"

"Maia!"

Grover's shoes sprouted wings.

He flew over the fence, did an unintended somersault in midair, and then stumbled to a landing on the opposite side. He dusted off his jeans, as if he'd planned the whole thing. "You guys coming?"

Annabeth and I had to climb the old-fashioned way, holding down the barbed wire for each other as we crawled over the top.

Barbed wire was such a greaaaaat defense against people hoping the fence it reaaaaaaalllly is.

The shadows grew long as we walked through the park, checking out the attractions. There was Ankle Biter Island, Head Over Wedgie, and Dude, Where's My Swimsuit?

No monsters came to get us. Nothing made the slightest noise. I was actually getting worried about that, there should be SOME noise.

We found a souvenir shop that had been left open. Merchandise still lined the shelves: snow globes, pencils, postcards, and racks of

"Clothes," Annabeth said. "Fresh clothes."

"Fuck. Yes."

She snatched an entire row of stuff of the racks and disappeared into the changing room. Meanwhile I searched for something that wouldn't make me look like a complete douche. Mostly black t-shirt with the words 'I went to Waterland and all I got was this stupid tee-shirt' on it was the best I could do. Quickly changing before putting my jacket back on, keeping on the dirty jeans – Nothing for it.

A few minutes later Annie came out in Waterland flower-print shorts, a big red Waterland T-shirt, and commemorative Waterland surf shoes. A Waterland backpack was slung over her shoulder, obviously stuffed with more goodies.

"What the heck." Grover shrugged. Soon, he too had new clothing on from Waterland.

Veni vidi vici

We continued searching for the Tunnel of Love.

Could I take a second to think about the name of that? Honestly didn't want to contemplate just what the two gods would be doing in the 'Tunnel of Love', but the naming choice was just horrible.

I got the feeling that the whole park was holding its breath, it was making me horribly tense.

"So Annie-Bitch, do you ever get a headache from listening to the tone in your voice?"

"Shut up, Percy."

"So… it seems that the love goddess likes bikers."

"Whatever."

"I'm still not sure I understand why they don't just get a divorce, sounds like everyone would be much happier. It's a problem that could be solved, so why is it a problem at all to the point that it carries on to us getting this quest?"

"I actually agree with you for once, but I guess there are reasons behind it. You shouldn't question the gods Percy. Anyway, because of the fact Hephaestus is always trying to embarrass them they meet in out-of-the-way places, like ..."

She stopped, looking straight ahead. "Like that."

In front of us was an empty pool that would've been fucking awesome for skateboarding. It was at least fifty yards across and shaped like a bowl. I might have came back to this place just for that.

Around the rim, a dozen bronze statues of Cupid stood guard with wings spread and bows ready to fire. On the opposite side from us, a tunnel opened up, probably where the water flowed into when the pool was full. The sign above it read, THRILL RIDE O' LOVE: THIS IS NOT YOUR PARENTS' TUNNEL OF LOVE!

I should hope I wouldn't be entering anything called my parents' tunnel of love…. Ever.

Grover crept toward the edge. "Guys, look."

Marooned at the bottom of the pool was a pink-and-white two-seater boat with a canopy over the top and little hearts painted all over it.

In the left seat, glinting in the fading light was Ares's shield, a polished circle of bronze. Yeah, because it was going to be that easy.

"This is too easy," I said. "So we just walk down there and get it?"

Annabeth ran her fingers along the base of the nearest Cupid statue.

"There's a Greek letter carved here," she said. "Eta. I wonder ..."

"Grover," I said, "you smell any monsters?"

He sniffed the wind. "Nothing."

"Nothing like, in-the-Arch-and-you-didn't-smell-Echidna nothing, or really nothing?" However there was no hurt meant in the comment, teasing could be clearly sense.

Grover pouted, rather than looking hurt. "I told you that was underground."

I took a deep breath. "I'm going down there."

"I'll go with you." Grover didn't sound too enthusiastic, but I got the feeling he was trying to make up for what had happened in St. Louis, despite the fact I was teasing, he likely still felt some responsibility.

"No," I told him. "I want you to stay up top with the flying shoes. You're the Red Baron, a flying ace, remember? I'll be counting on you for backup, in case something goes wrong - and looking at this situation, something is bound to go wrong. Just think of all the things that Brain Bitch could possibly fuck up."

Grover puffed up his chest a little. Mentally I smiled, happy that my friend felt even a little bit better about himself. Even though he didn't like me thinking about Annie like that, I could still make him feel good with a simple compliment.

"Sure. But what could go wrong?"

"I don't know. Just a feeling. Annie-Bitch, come with me-"

"Are you kidding?" She looked at me as if I'd just dropped from the moon. Her cheeks were bright red… No, she couldn't possibly even be going down that road of thought.

"What's the problem now?" I demanded.

"Me, go with you to the ... the 'Thrill Ride of Love'? How embarrassing is that? What if somebody saw me?"

Are you kidding me? What if someone saw her…

"What if someone saw me with you, Brain Bitch? Look I'm not happy with the situation, but get your head out of your ass and get it on the job. We have a quest to do; we don't need you bitching about immature things like that." I know that we are young, but gods it wasn't that bad.

"Fine, what-the-fuck-ever." I told her. "I'll do it myself." But when I started down the side of the pool, she followed me, muttering about how boys always messed things up.

How exactly was I messing anything up?

We reached the boat. The shield was propped on one seat, and next to it was a lady's silk scarf.

I tried to imagine Ares and Aphrodite here, a couple of gods meeting in a junked-out amusement-park ride. Why? Then I noticed something I hadn't seen from up top: mirrors all the way around the rim of the pool, facing this spot. We could see ourselves no matter which direction we looked. That must be it. While Ares and Aphrodite were smooching with each other they could look at their favorite people: themselves.

I snickered softly to myself at the thought. Trying not to think about the fact that they were most likely getting into a lot more than just kissing.

I picked up the scarf. It shimmered pink, and the perfume was indescribable rose, or mountain laurel. Something good. I smiled, a little dreamy, and was about to rub the scarf against my cheek, just then I came back to myself and almost threw it away, just as Annabeth ripped it out of my hand and stuffed it in her pocket. "Oh, no you don't. Stay away from that love magic."

"I realized… But if you actually continue figuring things out like that I might have to stop calling you a bitch."

"Just get the shield, Seaweed Brain, and let's get out of here."

I understood the hurry; last thing that I wanted was to end up in some sort of trap.

The moment I touched the shield, I knew we were in trouble. My hand broke through something that had been connecting it to the dashboard. A cobweb, I thought, but then I looked at a strand of it on my palm and saw it was some kind of metal filament, so fine it was almost invisible. A trip wire.

Just. Fucking. Great.

"Wait," Annabeth said.

"Too late."

"There's another Greek letter on the side of the boat, another Eta. This is a trap."

"Too fucking late Brain Bitch. I take back what I just said, you are most certainly one of the most-"

Noise erupted all around us, of a million gears grinding, as if the whole pool were turning into one giant machine.

Grover yelled, "Guys!"

Up on the rim, the Cupid statues were drawing their bows into firing position. Before I could suggest taking cover, they shot, but not at us. They fired at each other, across the rim of the pool. Silky cables trailed from the arrows, arcing over the pool and anchoring where they landed to form a huge golden asterisk. Then smaller metallic threads started weaving together magically between the main strands, making a net.

"We have to get out," I said, pretty calm considering the situation.

"Duh!" Annabeth said.

"Come on!" Grover shouted.

He was trying to hold open a section of the net for us, but wherever he touched it, the golden threads started to wrap around his hands.

The Cupids' heads popped open. Out came video cameras. Spotlights rose up all around the pool, blinding us with illumination, and a loudspeaker voice boomed: "Live to Olympus in one minute ... Fifty-nine seconds, fifty-eight ..."

"Hephaestus!" Annabeth screamed. "I'm so stupid. 'Eta is H.' He made this trap to catch his wife with Ares. Now we're going to be broadcast live to Olympus and look like absolute fools!"

"Finally noticed you're stupid huh. Took you long enough, but hey – At least I don't look like an idiot. Check the coat bitch, and these shades. You're the one that's going to look like an absolute fool, don't bring me into it."

We'd almost made it to the rim when the row of mirrors opened like hatches and thousands of tiny metallic... things poured out.

Annie screamed, I was almost worried for her.

It was an army of wind-up creepy-crawlies: bronze-gear bodies, spindly legs, and little pincer mouths, all scuttling toward us in a wave of clacking, whirring metal.

"Spiders!" Annabeth said. "Sp-sp-aaaah!"

I burst out into laughter; it was hard to keep it together when she was freaking out like that. This however didn't change the fact that she was my partner for this mission; I calmed myself just as she fell backward in terror, overwhelmed by spider robots, and I caught her and dragged her back toward the boat.

The things were coming out from all around the rim now, millions of them, flooding toward the center of the pool, completely surrounding us.

I told myself they probably weren't programmed to kill, just corral us and bite us and make us look stupid. Then again, this was a trap meant for gods. And we weren't gods.

Gods what had my life become.

Annabeth and I climbed into the boat.

I started kicking away the spiders as they swarmed aboard. I yelled at Annabeth to help me, but she was too paralyzed to do much more than scream.

"You fucking useless spider-fucking bitch help me!"

"Thirty, twenty-nine," called the loudspeaker.

The spiders started spitting out strands of metal thread, trying to tie us down. The strands were easy enough to break at first, but there were so many of them, and the spiders just kept coming. I kicked one away from Annabeth's leg and its pincers took a chunk out my shoe.

Grover hovered above the pool in his flying sneakers, trying to pull the net loose, but it wouldn't budge.

Think, I told myself. Think.

The Tunnel of Love entrance was under the net. We could use it as an exit, except that it was blocked by a million robot spiders.

"Fifteen, fourteen," the loudspeaker called.

_Water_, I thought. _Where does the ride's water come from?_

Then I saw them: huge water pipes behind the mirrors, where the spiders had come from. And up above the net, next to one of the Cupids, a glass-windowed booth that must be the controller's station.

"Grover!" I yelled. "Get into that booth! Find the 'on' switch!"

"But-"

"Do it!" It was a crazy hope, but hey, maybe it could work and I could shove it in Annie's face that I managed to think something like that out well she was a useless sack of shit.

Looking back at her I felt bad, continued to at least attempt to keep them away from her. Even I wasn't cruel enough to let someone's worst fear kill them, no matter how much I disliked them.

The spiders were all over the prow of the boat now. Annabeth was screaming her head off. I had to get us out of there.

Grover was in the controller's booth now, slamming away at the buttons.

"Five, four-"

Grover looked up at me hopelessly, raising his hands. He was letting me know that he'd pushed every button, but still nothing was happening.

I closed my eyes and thought about waves, rushing water, the Mississippi River. I felt a familiar tug in my gut. I tried to imagine that I was dragging the ocean all the way to Denver.

"Two, one, zero!"

Water exploded out of the pipes. It roared into the pool, sweeping away the spiders. I pulled Annabeth into the seat next to me and fastened her seat belt just as the tidal wave slammed into our boat, over the top, whisking the spiders away and dousing us completely, but not capsizing us. The boat turned, lifted in the flood, and spun in circles around the whirlpool.

Because damn I was good.

The water was full of short-circuiting spiders, some of them smashing against the pool's concrete wall with such force they burst.

Spotlights glared down at us. The Cupid-cams were rolling, live to Olympus.

But I could only concentrate on controlling the boat. I willed it to ride the current, to keep away from the wall. Maybe it was my imagination, but the boat seemed to respond. Honestly I was getting with these power things, it was actually pretty cool.

We spun around one last time, the water level now almost high enough to shred us against the metal net.

Then the boat's nose turned toward the tunnel and we rocketed through into the darkness.

Annie clung to be screaming as the boat shot curls and hugged corners and took forty-five-degree plunges past pictures of Romeo and Juliet and a bunch of other Valentine's Day stuff.

"Oh my god this might be the worst day in my life. Really…." I muttered to myself as she gripped me tighter. Gods, I understood spiders but get a fucking hold on yourself.

Then we were out of the tunnel, the night air whistling through our hair as the boat barreled straight toward the exit.

If the ride had been in working order, we would've sailed off a ramp between the golden Gates of Love and splashed down safely in the exit pool. But there was a problem. The Gates of Love were chained. Two boats that had been washed out of the tunnel before us were now piled against the barricade one submerged, the other cracked in half.

"Unfasten your seat belt," I yelled to Annie.

"Are you crazy?"

"Unless you want to get smashed to death." I strapped Ares' shield to my arm. "We're going to have to jump for it."

My idea was simple and insane.

As the boat struck, we would use its force like a springboard to jump the gate. I'd heard of people surviving car crashes that way, getting thrown thirty or forty feet away from an accident. With luck, we would land in the pool.

Annabeth seemed to understand. She gripped my hand as the gates got closer.

"On my mark," I said.

"No! On my mark!"

"What? You can't be fucking serious."

Now of all times to be a Brain Bitch? Might as well just let her have this one.

"Simple physics!" she yelled. "Force times the trajectory angle-"

"Fine.'" I shouted. "On your mark!"

She hesitated ... hesitated ... then yelled, "Now!"

Crack!

Annabeth was right.

If we'd jumped when I thought we should've, we would've crashed into the gates. She got us maximum lift. Unfortunately, that was a little more than we needed. Something else for me to shove into her face later, as if I hadn't gained enough ammunition already.

Our boat smashed into the pileup and we were thrown into the air, straight over the gates, over the pool, and down toward solid asphalt.

Something grabbed me from behind.

Annabeth yelled, "Ouch!"

Grover!

In midair, he had grabbed me by the shirt and Annabeth by the arm, and was trying to pull us out of a crash landing, but Annabeth and I had all the momentum.

Grover was awesome, if I hadn't known it before I did now.

"You're too heavy!" Grover said. "We're going down!"

We spiraled toward the ground, Grover doing his best to slow the fall.

We smashed into a photo-board, Grover's head going straight into the hole where tourists would put their faces, pretending to be Noo-Noo the Friendly Whale.

Annabeth and I tumbled to the ground, banged up but alive. Ares's shield was still on my arm. I might have kept it if I didn't think it would have gotten me killed.

Once we caught our breath, Annabeth and I got Grover out of the photo-board and thanked him for saving our lives. I looked back at the Thrill Ride of Love. The water was subsiding. Our boat had been smashed to pieces against the gates.

A hundred yards away, at the entrance pool, the Cupids were still filming.

The statues had swiveled so that their cameras were trained straight on us, the spotlights in our faces.

"Show's over!" I yelled. "Thank you and kiss my sweet sword bitch asses!"

The Cupids turned back to their original positions. The lights shut off. The park went quiet and dark again, except for the gentle trickle of water into the Thrill Ride of Love's exit pool. I wondered if Olympus had gone to a commercial break, or if our ratings had been any good.

I hated being teased. I hated being tricked. And I had plenty of experience handling bullies who liked to do that stuff to me. Gabe being one of the biggest contenders for top of that particular shit list.

I truly had enough of it, thus proved to Olympus via prank at this point.

I hefted the shield on my arm and turned to my friend and reluctance and useless partner. "We need to have a little talk with Ares."

* * *

><p>End:<p>

Author Note: Soo… What did you think? A few things I wanted to address in regards to Annabeth. This will NOT be a Percy X Annabeth story as I'm sure you can tell; However I will be having them become closer and better friends soon enough. It's called **character development**, and it's gonna happen!

Also I **picked out who the pairing** is going to be, again I am not going to say… It wouldn't be any fun that way. However guesses can have a cookie though. I decided on **Percy being bisexual**, because I don't picture gods having a problem with laying with different sex's at all, I don't see why their children should either. So you don't even know the gender~

It's worth mentioning though, that they **won't be getting together for another few books**. Percy is what, twelve? Minds out of the gutter jackasses.

ONE MORE THING! **Do you guys want me to do an Interlude: God's React to Love Tunnel?** LET ME KNOW!~

**See you next time and review!**


	7. Interlude: Gods React Love Tunnel

Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson

Warnings: **Language is going to be strong.** If you have a problem with it I suggest not reading it. I'll rate this fic at T for now, but with a possibly of it rising higher than that in the future.

Summary: Percy had enough of bending to other people, be it Gods or Gabe. The Sea didn't like being restrained, and neither did Percy. It was time to make a change for the better and to be his own person. Different!Badass!Swearing!Cool!Percy

Author Note: Alright… This was hard to make. I might have to start doing it from first person instead of third. Sucks but it's so much easier…

I'm also thinking about, like **after the end of this book, doing an interlude of letters between Percy and his Father** over school or something. Let me know what you think. I'm planning actually, on not going the second book in it's whole, and skimming over it toward the third book. Third book is better imo anyway, so I'll probs do it, unless literally EVERYONE is against it.

Chapter Seven: Gods Reaction Love Tunnel

If the gods had been arguing before, it had nothing on what was going on now.

The faster that the time limit approached, the less that they were talking. If anything, the tense atmosphere was worse than just plain out fighting. It was so thick you would need a saw to cut it.

That of course, changed if only slightly when they got the warning that one of Hephaestus' little shows were coming to be coming on air. It was actually something of a running joke between them all, and usually the whole thing was pretty funny. The second that the hologram appeared with a ten second count down, most of the gods that weren't there, quickly made their way to see just what was going on.

What was unusual was the fact that Ares and Aphrodite were both there, so just who was in the trap? Ares, of course knew the second that he stepped into the room and saw what was happening.

Well, the kid was amusing before, maybe this would just make it better.

The count was at 5 seconds and going down, Hephaestus was internally smirking.

Whoever was in that particular trap, would find that although the sound down said they had just about a minute before the cameras started, well he was a god. It was much more amusing to just start without that little count down. Sure, he didn't know who was inside of it, but this was one of his best traps yet.

An opinion which changed the second that he realized just who it was that happened to be in the trap the second that the time limit ended. Hephaestus had assumed that it was going to be perhaps some minor god or something, and definitely didn't expect it to be Annabeth, Percy, and Grover to suddenly show up on the hologram in the middle of the room.

Poseidon himself wasn't exactly happy with this fact. Worry was practically bleeding from his eyes the moment that he saw his son in that trap. Everyone knew that no God would die from that, but demigods, well that changed everything.

Zeus was in between hoping that they died, and hoping that they lived to bring him back his bolt. Although after that little slight with the letters, he was certainly leaning more toward the kill side.

Athena was actually pretty calm about the whole situation. Of course, that was because she knew that her daughter would live through the experience. Brains always won out,

Hera, Dionysus, and Artemis were not there. The little prank shows weren't something that they were interested in. However they were the only gods not in attendance.

Hermes was just watching, hoping that something amusing would happen with this particular demigod. So far everything had been pretty funny when in relation to the new kid; he hoped that it would be a trend.

Apollo was the one to notice one of the most important facts, raising an eyebrow, "Ares, is that kid wearing your jacket and shades?"

Scowling somewhat at the reminder of the fact he spoke, "Yeah, kid wouldn't go to get my shield back without me giving them to him. Annoying little shit, but at least he's got thick skin. Power barely worked on him too, he's pretty impressive. Of course, I wasn't trying all that hard, but still."

Poseidon smiled in pride toward his son.

Athena was about to open her mouth to speak on the fact the disobedient demigod was far too powerful for their own good, when the first words that they heard over the magic hologram/television was spoken.

_**The Cupids' heads popped open. Out came video cameras. Spotlights rose up all around the pool, blinding us with illumination, and a loudspeaker voice boomed: "Live to Olympus in one minute ... Fifty-nine seconds, fifty-eight ..."**_

_**"Hephaestus!" Annabeth screamed. "I'm so stupid.'Eta is H.' He made this trap to catch his wife with Ares. Now we're going to be broadcast live to Olympus and look like absolute fools!"**_

Athena smiled in pride toward her daughter; she was so quick to figure things out. One of her smartest children in quite some time.

_**"Finally noticed you're stupid huh. Took you long enough, but hey – At least I don't look like an idiot. Check the coat bitch, and these shades. You're the one that's going to look like an absolute fool, don't bring me into it."**_

Ares nodded in agreement as soon as possible. Damn right the kid looks cool in that, anyone that wore it would, after all they were his.

Athena was furious about the slight toward her child. Of course, she didn't realize that she only had herself to blame. If she hadn't made herself out to be an idiot that almost got her own daughter killed, then Percy wouldn't have come to think that the daughter took after the mother. You gain your fatal flaw from the flaws of your parents, and Athena's inability to admit her wrong doings were traited toward her children. Hubris, to this moment and beyond she wouldn't ever be able to admit that she was wrong about anyone in Poseidon's line.

Hermes just snorted somewhat, damn kid was so snarky.

Poseidon felt a lot of pride toward his son, who seemed so calm in the face of danger. Maybe a little bit too witty, but that came from his father so there was no way he could fault him for that.

Aphrodite was actually pouting a bit, that jacket had looked really good on Ares, and those shades had been expensive and designer. Of course, she was the one that bought the shades for him, and he'd given them away to the demigod? Aphrodite started thinking of creative ways to punish her boyfriend. (Winkwink.)

_**We'd almost made it to the rim when the row of mirrors opened like hatches and thousands of tiny metallic... things poured out.**_

_**Annie screamed, I was almost worried for her.**_

Even though she didn't think her daughter was in trouble, the fact that she was screaming even though demigods went through such training at a young age meant something was wrong, and once Athena saw what it was that was pouring out, even the goddess flinched violently – Glaring toward Hephaestus.

_**It was an army of wind-up creepy-crawlies: bronze-gear bodies, spindly legs, and little pincer mouths, all scuttling toward us in a wave of clacking, whirring metal.**_

_**"Spiders!" Annabeth said. "Sp-sp-aaaah!"**_

A good number of the gods were actually sympathetic toward the girl, facing your fear like that was horrible. Especially Hermes and Apollo, who'd, both pranked Athena before with spiders, but they knew when to stop. The goddess was deadly scared of them. The two of them remembered the retribution from those pranks in a great amount of fear.

_**I burst out into laughter; it was hard to keep it together when she was freaking out like that. This however didn't change the fact that she was my partner for this mission; I calmed myself just as she fell backward in terror, overwhelmed by spider robots, and I caught her and dragged her back toward the boat.**_

Poseidon was almost worried, watching the way that his son although hating Annabeth, still helped her like that. He could tell that his son didn't like the women, and he sincerely hoped that it was because he was a good person beneath that entire new attitude, then because of the fatal flaw that most of his offspring gained. Personal Loyalty, and with him being a good chance of being the person of 'that' prediction…

_**The things were coming out from all around the rim now, millions of them, flooding toward the center of the pool, completely surrounding us.**_

_**I told myself they probably weren't programmed to kill, just corral us and bite us and make us look stupid. Then again, this was a trap meant for gods. And we weren't gods.**_

_**Gods what had my life become.**_

_**Annabeth and I climbed into the boat.**_

_**I started kicking away the spiders as they swarmed aboard. I yelled at Annabeth to help me, but she was too paralyzed to do much more than scream.**_

_**"You fucking useless spider-fucking bitch help me!"**_

Apollo, Hermes, and Ares snorted and damn near went into laughter. Poseidon even sorted the 'Useless Spider-Fucking Bitch' thing away. Who knew when he would feel the burning need for a new insult toward Athena?

Athena herself was just somewhat still, the image of the spiders even though the hologram made her uneasy.

Zeus on the other hand, for the first time since the meeting began started to grumble. The insults toward his favourites daughter grated on his nerves… "Insolent demigod…"

Hephaestus on the other hand was feeling more or less guilty. He'd taken a liking toward this demigod, and felt a sympathy that he rarely felt for other's before. The letters and some of the subtle things that had been reveled made him want to help the young Halfling, and he even had a plan of something that he was going to build for him. Before he was going to wait until Percy was older, but now he felt like he not only felt for the demigod, but also owed him something of a debt. With that in mind though – He sat down and continued to watch.

Personal feelings of guilt aside, the kid was funny. Something he was sure that most of them, sans Zeus and Athena, found him.

_**The spiders were all over the prow of the boat now. Annabeth was screaming her head off. I had to get us out of there.**_

Pretty much everyone was getting worried at this point. Having seen what one of the spider's bites did to Percy's shoes, they were all sure that they would have no trouble ripping out a demigod throat.

_**Grover was in the controller's booth now, slamming away at the buttons.**_

_**"Five, four-"**_

_**Grover looked up at me hopelessly, raising his hands. He was letting me know that he'd pushed every button, but still nothing was happening.**_

Worry increases as Percy's plan to have Grover pushing buttons failed.

Zeus looked at Grover with hate in his eyes. Just the fact that the goat was still alive after what happened to his daughter made him mad. There shouldn't have been a second chance for that failure, after it's failing to protect his daughter.

Poseidon however felt a tug in his stomach, the feeling of someone using power of water, one of his own children, and he gave a smirk. Seemed that Percy would be just fine. Plus it was deliberate this time; it seemed that his son was learning.

_**I closed my eyes and thought about waves, rushing water, the Mississippi River. I felt a familiar tug in my gut. I tried to imagine that I was dragging the ocean all the way to Denver.**_

_**"Two, one, zero!"**_

_**Water exploded out of the pipes. It roared into the pool, sweeping away the spiders. I pulled Annabeth into the seat next to me and fastened her seat belt just as the tidal wave slammed into our boat, over the top, whisking the spiders away and dousing us completely, but not capsizing us. The boat turned, lifted in the flood, and spun in circles around the whirlpool.**_

_**Because damn I was good.**_

In that moment, Athena felt thankful toward the demigod that she knew she should avoid to look at him objectively. Despite the fact it didn't seem like it, and even though she didn't like to admit she was wrong about anything, she did care about her children. Perhaps not to the extent which others cared about their own, but she did. Percy Jackson had saved her daughter, and though she wouldn't ever change her opinion of them because she was knowledge and she knew best, that didn't mean that gratitude couldn't be felt.

Poseidon smirked at the show of just how powerful his son was going to become. It was rare that his sons were that strong, the last one had been a long time ago.

Zeus was glaring at the image of the Sea Gods son. He was far too powerful for his age; it was a treat that needed to be solved and soon before it became a problem.

Hermes and Apollo were cheering, like seriously cheering, "Go Percy!"

Ares nodded in approval, the demigod was making interesting waves that could result in some interesting things. His own problems currently aside, the future looked bright for the god of war considering how the demigod was growing.

Aphrodite was looking at the young boy in interest. It seemed like he was going to be interesting, a bad boy attitude, and good taste in clothing, already pretty attractive for his age. Seemed like he was going to be interesting to play with regarding love life. Her lips twitched – She already had some interesting idea's she could move him toward.

_**Then the boat's nose turned toward the tunnel and we rocketed through into the darkness.**_

_**Annie clung to be screaming as the boat shot curls and hugged corners and took forty-five-degree plunges past pictures of Romeo and Juliet and a bunch of other Valentine's Day stuff.**_

Aphrodite could almost think that it was a cute couple, if she didn't see the dislike that practically came off of Percy with waves. Sure, she could do something about that, force the relationship, but it wouldn't be stable, not with that level of dislike. It was almost too bad, they could have been cute.

Athena couldn't believe her eyes. Her daughter was NOT hanging off of that sea spawn. Glaring at her daughter, Athena vowed to watch the girl closer to make sure she wasn't making any other actions unworthy of her station as a daughter of Athena.

_**"Oh my god this might be the worst day in my life. Really…." I muttered to myself as she gripped me tighter. Gods, I understood spiders but get a fucking hold on yourself.**_

Apollo winced almost sympathetically. He knew what it was like, dealing with women that you didn't like practically attaching themselves to you. No matter what the situation was, it was always horrifying. Sure, he didn't do much to stop the situation considering his reputation to sleep around a lot, but still.

_**Then we were out of the tunnel, the night air whistling through our hair as the boat barreled straight toward the exit.**_

_**If the ride had been in working order, we would've sailed off a ramp between the golden Gates of Love and splashed down safely in the exit pool. But there was a problem. The Gates of Love were chained. Two boats that had been washed out of the tunnel before us were now piled against the barricade one submerged, the other cracked in half.**_

_**"Unfasten your seat belt," I yelled to Annie.**_

Any feeling of sympathy felt by the Goddess of Wisdom left her in that moment.

"Just how stupid can this child get? Taking off the seat belt will only make it worse. How dare he even think about endangering my child in such a way?" Came her self-righteous tone.

Poseidon narrowed his eyes at her, "Athena, watch your mouth. You don't know the exact situation, you can only see so much and you certainly can't see inside his mind to see what he has planned. Be quiet lest you show yourself to be wrong in the end."

Athena just gave a hum of disapproval and turns her worried eyes toward the hologram. If she hadn't been so controlled by her emotions in that moment, she might have understood just what Percy was planning.

_**"Are you crazy?"**_

_**"Unless you want to get smashed to death." I strapped Ares' shield to my arm. "We're going to have to jump for it."**_

Ares almost glared at the fact the demigod had the audacity to use his shield. Then of course, he remembered that the kid had practically stripped him as payment for the job in the first place. Couldn't exactly get worse than that.

_**My idea was simple and insane.**_

_**As the boat struck, we would use its force like a springboard to jump the gate. I'd heard of people surviving car crashes that way, getting thrown thirty or forty feet away from an accident. With luck, we would land in the pool.**_

With… Luck?

The thought nearly all the gods' heads, even Zeus. The demigod was relying on luck to get him through this? It was practically insane, of course the only thing he had going for him was, well, it could actually work.

_**Annabeth seemed to understand. She gripped my hand as the gates got closer.**_

_**"On my mark," I said.**_

_**"No! On my mark!"**_

_**"What? You can't be fucking serious."**_

_**Now of all times to be a Brain Bitch? Might as well just let her have this one.**_

_**"Simple physics!" she yelled. "Force times the trajectory angle-"**_

_**"Fine.'" I shouted. "On your mark!"**_

Many of the men smirked at that. Seemed that Percy had already learned one of the most important rules to working with women. Sometimes, you just had to let them have their own way. It was usually just easier to do so.

_**She hesitated ... hesitated ... then yelled, "Now!"**_

_**Crack!**_

_**Annabeth was right.**_

_**If we'd jumped when I thought we should've, we would've crashed into the gates. She got us maximum lift. Unfortunately, that was a little more than we needed. Something else for me to shove into her face later, as if I hadn't gained enough ammunition already.**_

_**Our boat smashed into the pileup and we were thrown into the air, straight over the gates, over the pool, and down toward solid asphalt.**_

The worry became real, when the moment that they jumped; they knew just what would happen. Annabeth might have been right, but it was too much. Percy's 'now' most likely would have been far better.

Judging by how they would land, the pain would be real. Of course, they would live. They were demigods after all; their bodies could take a lot more punishment. Minds that jumped to the worse case realized it would be the end of the quest, and more than likely Percy would end up arrested by the human authorities for the building that had blown up. That was if Zeus hadn't killed him because of the suspicion of the missing bolt and not returning it.

_**Something grabbed me from behind.**_

_**Annabeth yelled, "Ouch!"**_

_**Grover!**_

Collective sigh of relief from the parents, which was of course broken by Hermes reaction a few moments later, "Hey! Where did they get those?"

Gods blinked, Apollo went into hysterics again, and Ares felt he now had a companion. The shoes Grover was wearing just happened to be Hermes winged converse. How these kids kept getting into the gods wardrobe was beyond them?

Hermes noticed something though, that was going to be far too heavy, carrying two people like that.

"I know the feeling, bro." Ares spoke, before everyone's attention went back to the hologram.

_**In midair, he had grabbed me by the shirt and Annabeth by the arm, and was trying to pull us out of a crash landing, but Annabeth and I had all the momentum.**_

_**Grover was awesome, if I hadn't known it before I did now.**_

_**"You're too heavy!" Grover said. "We're going down!"**_

_**We spiraled toward the ground, Grover doing his best to slow the fall.**_

It seemed like they were going to live. Might be hurt, but it wasn't going to be nearly as bad as it was before. Poseidon thought to himself that he might have to give that Grover a reward for this.

_**We smashed into a photo-board, Grover's head going straight into the hole where tourists would put their faces, pretending to be Noo-Noo the Friendly Whale.**_

_**Annabeth and I tumbled to the ground, banged up but alive. Ares's shield was still on my arm. I might have kept it if I didn't think it would have gotten me killed.**_

Ares narrowed his eyes, that look was the same damn one that had been in the kid's eye when he'd taken the jacket and shades. Lil'cousin best not even think about trying that shit with his shield. The jacket was good enough, that shield was never leaving his side again.

_**Once we caught our breath, Annabeth and I got Grover out of the photo-board and thanked him for saving our lives. I looked back at the Thrill Ride of Love. The water was subsiding. Our boat had been smashed to pieces against the gates.**_

_**A hundred yards away, at the entrance pool, the Cupids were still filming.**_

_**The statues had swiveled so that their cameras were trained straight on us, the spotlights in our faces.**_

_**"Show's over!" I yelled. "Thank you and kiss my sweet sword bitch asses!"**_

Hermes and Apollo were in hysterics over that,

"Damn I fucking love this kid. The sheer gut that he has is just perfect. God I hope he lives through this." From Apollo.

Poseidon was happy over the fact that his son lived, and smirking over what he'd said. The recklessness needed to be worked on, but at least he was alive. The sheer rebelliousness of near everything that he said fit the attitude of the ocean so completely; it sent sparks of pride through his heart.

"SILENCE!" Came a booming voice from Zeus, who'd had enough of the fun and games in regards to this particular demigod.

"That is enough, the insolent demigod has a job and so do you. Find my lightning bolt, before it results in war. Do not forget the situation that we are in!" HE glared at them all, before walking off in a flare.

The dramatic exit was not lost on them.

"…Should have been the god of theater." Came Hermes comment, under his breath so that the man wouldn't hear it.

Hephaestus had snuck off once they had finished the hologram and went back his work shop. The final idea for just what he wanted to make was in his head. Of course, it was going to take some time to build, but in essence it was perfect. The piece of advice that went with it was exactly what the demigod would need, judging by just what other people were saying already. He even had something else in mind, a bonus if you would.

Poseidon also left shortly after Hermes comment, the last time that he heard from his son via letter, he'd planned to write his own to send to him. Of course, he wasn't going to be sending any letters right away, the quest was still ongoing. That didn't mean that it couldn't wait until after – he had faith that his son was going to live though this.

_Dear Percy,_

_I read your last note, and trust me the reactions that you got were even funnier then I'm sure you imagined them to be. _

_My taste in women is actually quite good I'll have you know, Athena was at fault for that horrible mistake. Truthfully, Medusa was beautiful, and one of the kindest women I'd ever known. Athena changed that._

_I'm not sure how she is shown in mythology, but Medusa was the blessed of Aphrodite, because of that she was loved. With this love however, came many that wanted her only for her beauty, and some that tried to force her to be with them despite her wishes. I'd come across her after Aphrodite tried to set me up with her, at the time I'd been unhappy with my life as one of my sons had just died a horrible death._

_Me and Medusa were quite loving toward each other, as friends and more. Neither of us was completely in love, but we healed each other's hurts. Until one day Medusa was taken from one of the men that had before followed her around so closely. She'd been taken to Athena's temple, prepared to be scarified toward the 'Wisdom Goddess' when I'd gotten there and killed her attackers. I went on to comfort her, if you know what I mean._

_Athena came to the temple, and without giving us the change to explain punished Medusa for my own wrong doing. To this day, no matter how me and Aphrodite ask, Athena will not change her mind on the punishment. The Goddess refuses to see the reason behind what happened, refusing to believe that she could possibly be wrong._

_So that's the story, the true one anyway. There's a bit more to it, but that's the basics._

_So tell me, _

_What's your favourite thing to do? Favourite colour? I want to hear more about you. I watch over you of course, every moment that I can, however I still feel separated. If not for this stupid law, well needless to say you wouldn't have had to deal with that Gabe…_

_Your Father, Poseidon_

End:

Author Note:

Also, someone in on of my reviews said that the **swearing was a bit too much, what's your opinions guys**? Should I lighten up a bit? Not much of course, I refuse to go out of the new character I set for Percy, but if it's too bad I lighten up…. Let me know~

Next chapter after this should be out in a few days, see yah then guys~


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